Tiddlywinks Bibliography • School Publications

Tucked away within the hallowed halls of Melbourne University lies the state championships of a little known sport of squobing winks and flicking squidgers, which brings to the table a rich serving of Australia’s international sporting history.

The game? Tiddlywinks. This year’s state championships boasted 16 of Victoria’s best teams battling it out for a spot at the national championships, which will be held at Melbourne University in October of this year.

The rules are simple: The game is played in teams of 2 who are placed diagonally opposite each other around a table. Sets of small discs called “winks” lie on a flat mat. But the fun doesn’t end there. According to the Wikipedia, “Players use a larger disc called a “squidger” to pop a wink into flight by pressing down on one side of the wink. The objective of the game is to cause the winks to land either on top of opponents’ winks, or ultimately inside a pot or cup.” Tiddlywinks was first played in the parlours of England in 1888 and has managed to survive two world wars, the onset of globalisation and the eruption of mount Eyjafjallajökull.

This year Andrew “more work?” Rowse and Shane “require additional lumber” Peirce defeated the previous champions Timothy “righto” Czydel and Jason “godlike” Ratcliffe in a thrilling final. The two winning elite athletes have since had their names proudly inscribed upon the book of State Champions by the internationally recognised adjudicator Willow “Job Done” Wilson. While this tournament has been concluded it is good to know that such obscure sports continue to flourish in the nurturing environment of the University of Melbourne.

This year’s competition showed a strong adherence to traditions created with the tournament’s INCEPTION (great movie). These traditions are varied and many but some of the more common include a traditional drink (port) and a requirement for formal dress. There are also specifications for the tournament equipment, including a requirement for red, moulded plastic pots, and for the winks to be hand crafted in Italy. A tradition particular to this tournament was the use of the original mat first purchased for the very first Victorian State Tiddlywinks Championships.

Stephanie “wicked sick” Field and Devrim “monster kill” van Dijk both competed in the Tiddlywinks state finals and did terribly.

• The lego blocks fall with the tinker toys,
• Toy cars sit idle, parked in no special order.
• Tiddlywinks line the floor in a profusion of colour.
• On the wall to wall carpet of clutter.

This year the Engineering Athletic Association is adopting a new policy designed to inform everyone of who does what in the Athletic Association. Each member of the Athletic Association will be responsible for a group of sports. The member’s name and phone number will be listed on a poster in the Little Red Skule House, and along side his name will be the names and phone numbers of all managers looking after the various teams which are playing the particular sport with which the member is concerned. As a result, any star tiddly-wink player from Timbucthree will be able to locate the person directly concerned with his respective sport, and will be suitably put to work earning points for dear old S.P.S.

"Bridge isn’t so bad after all”, she announced. “I can ee now why you are such an addict. So, just to please you, I invited the X’s back to our place to-morrow night for another evening exactly like this one. It should really be fun. Oh, by the way, could I have ten dollars so that we could serve them a light lunch?"

What a catastrophe! My strategy backfired—weeks of planning down the drain—years of agony lying ahead.

Anyone for tiddlywinks?

Yes, we recommend the immediate abolishment of all sadistic blood-letting hockey, basketball, skiing, sports, such as football, and tiddlywinks. Now that football has definitely proved detrimental to health, heart, and pigs, we feel that immediate legislation is required to make playing these sports a felony.

Do you realize that not one hockey player over ten years old has his own teeth? Although dentists may find this encouraging, we do not.

Rod McCormack - III Chemical

Qualifications- Participation in all body contact sports for 8 years including lovin’.

Platform- “More support for all athletics sports from tiddleywinks up”.

Toronto: Toike Oike exclusive.

[sic original="Its" correct="It's"] happened! The Engineering Society Tiddly Wink (Unbeaten in International Competition) Team is pleased to announce that the Engineering Society Tiddly Wink Championship Marathon World Record Attempt will be on Jan. 19, 20, and 21 at the Towne and Countrye Square. Eight illustrious squidgers will be tiddlying for over 58 hours, to set a new world's record in squidging and squopping. At present the record is held by squalid squidgers at Waterloo, who eked out a measly 56 hours a few months ago.

The Eng. Soc. in typical form has a real bash planned to celebrate this record attempt. At the Towne and Countrye Square (situated at Young and Steeles) There will be yelling, screaming, tiddlying, the L.G.M.B., CTV, and a cast of thousands. Associate memberships will be sold by beautiful blondes and brunettes, all proceeds going to the Heart Fund.

Everyone at U of T is invited to attend, and Arts-women are especially wel-come. Food, and people will help encourage these illustrious participants to break the record and bring honour lo U of T, and glory to the sport of tiddly winks.

To give a hand, to the tiddlers and to the Heart Fund, be there at six o'clock on Sat. Jan. 21, when the record will be broken. Everyone will be there.

Letter to the editor from Bryon Alexandroff

• The Editor,
• Varsity Newspaper,
• 91 St. George St.,
• Toronto, Ontario

Dear Sir:

I would like to comment upon the calibre of the Varsity's reporting (or lack of reporting), with regards to relevant news items around campus.

Recently (the weekend of Jan. 21st), the Engineering Society’s Tiddly Winks Team shattered the University of Waterloo's record of 56 hours, and established a new world's record ol 67 hours, of non-stop, non-sleep, non-[sic original="drup"] tiddlywinking. This all took place at the Towne & Countrye Square, North Toronto. Four players who went 56 hours, are Barry Corbin (I MPC), Mel Solmon (I APSC), Bob Osborne (I APSC) and Doc Lavelle (I APSC). The four players who went the record of 67 hours are myself, Al Laucke (I APSC), Ken Clarke (I APSC) and Paul Zutautus (I APSC). Obviously, the Varsity has little or no interest in the fact that the University of Toronto hosts a world championship team. Also, it is obvious that the Varsity wishes to deprive this knowledge from the rest of the University—but does the Varsity also discount the importance of the Heart Fund!!!

The team sold honorary associate memberships at the Shopping Plaza, with all proceeds going to the Heart Fund. We then decided to do the same at the University. Since we received little support from the students, due to lack of publicity before the marathon, we felt that possibly the Varsity would rectify this oversight, by making it known, that the team would be selling memberships on campus. The Varsity again refused to publicize this effort.

Since this world championship event was covered by CTV, CHUM, CKFH, CBC (Sports a Go-Go) and several local newspapers, it is difficult to understand why we received no coverage in the Varsity. Are we to assume that the Varsity is not interested in aiding a campus group, in raising money for a worthy charity such as the Heart Fund?

We hope that you will print this letter, and let the University population know that:

1. They have a World's Championship Tiddlywink team.
2. Even Prince Phillip recognized this marathon, and wished us his best, in the form of a personal letter.
3. The team is still selling honorary associate memberships on campus, this week.
4. The Tiddlywink team is not 'MAD' at the Varsity.

Yours respectfully,

Bryon Alexandroff (I APSC)

Listing of Toike Oike editors

Tiddlywinks Editors… Byron & Elaine

In a recent dispatch from England I learned much to my delight, that the 67 hour tiddlywinks marathon that was held last January will be published as a new world's record in the Guiness Book of Records—'67 edition. Congratulations to all participants.—Balex

Listing of editors of the Toike Oike newspaper

Tiddled Wink… Bryon Alexandroff

The Engineering tiddlywinks team is well known all over the campus for their world-shattering, record-breaking, 67 hour non-stop, non sleep tiddlywink marathon held at a shopping plaza last January. Because of their fantastic achievement last year the Engineer's team has been invited to represent the University of Toronto at the North American Championships October 27-29 at the University of Waterloo. The team will be playing with other groups from U.C.L.A., M.I.T., Harvard, Cornell, etc. (ivy league, eh). There is only one hitch. 8 players of the highest calibre must be chosen to participate at Waterloo for the North American Championship. This is for real! If the Engineering team is successful they will advance to the world championship in London against Oxford later on next year. Leave your name and qualifications at the Engineering Stores in an envelope addressed to 'Balex' as soon as possible. Don’t be shy!! We need every winker.

The Tiddlywink Team Meeting scheduled for Nov. 23 at 8:00 p.m. in Room 76 at New College has been changed to Dec. 7 same time, same place. All those interested in travelling to New York and playing the game call Balex RU. 3-9203.

The university of Toronto Tiddlywink team is again travelling to bring goodwill to winkers all over the world. This time a group of eight carefully chosen team members are travellling to Cornell University to play against the Ivy League Universltles down under. Harvard. Cornell, M.I.T., Cambridge and Waterloo utheran will be repsented at the Continental Championships December 6,7, 8. Team members Bryon Alexandroff, Mel Solmon, Lindsa Horenblas, Barry Corbin, Glen Kezwer, Don Sheldon, Paul Milgram, Arthur Slutsky and road manager Mark [sic original="Mandlsohn"] will try to capture the North American title. The winning team will travel to Europe to play in the World Championships in the Spring. Just as a small note; the endurance record of 678 hours nonstop winking was broken last month in England by three hours. The University of Toronto team is now looking for people who wish to stay awake and beat that record sometime in February. Please submit names to the Engineering stores. Godiva winks too.

In the closing minutes of the game, despair and hope were etched on the faces of the combatants. Nerves were taut. Each little nerve ending tingled. The feel of warm felt (Farsity recommends fur) against the skin sent the players into paroxysms of ecstasy. The Trawna U. Tiddlewinders were within inches (6 inches to be exact) of scoring; a major triumph. Once again they would be bringing the bacon home. The Clawed T. Bizzel Memorial Cup and Bed Pan Trophy would return to Trawna.

A squop, a wink, and two pots would end it all for another year. Months of hard work and training would culminate in bringing the whole team to a successful [sic original="climas" correct="climax"] (on the table?). After the presentation of the Bizzel Cup, we talked with the head coach of the Blews, serving his second year with the team (previous conviction 1 year for procuring). He told us of his hopes and frustrations, to which we suggested he try Freud. Eventually, he told us about the team.

"Our players are in training for the complete summer, going through a rigorous program of exercise, so that their fingers are in truly fine shape. We have some of the finest fingermen in the [sic original="cuntry" intended]. They also spend 4 hours a day on the pot squidging and desquopping. We believe that the team that plays together stays together. Our only problem now is that they are playing a little too much together.

Our summer training camp was held in Montreal this year at Norm Silver’s Moustache. The ever present talent scouts were on hand to pick up their draft choices (Labatt’s and Molson’s on tap). With the expansion of the NTNL there is a great demand for our Tiddlers. The members of our team have always risen to the occasion. Sometimes they rise for no occasion at all.

"During the regular game schedule the team is under a strict set of rules. With a 10 pm curfew, no drinking (after 1 am) and no smoking (within nose shot of a narc), life is austere. The two female members of our team though, are reall ygreat. Like I said before, our team eats, sleeps and plays together. The guys have voted them most valuable players for the last two years.

This reporter can only say that he was truly amazed. The techniques displayed by the team were fantastic. Some of their positions and methods are so revolutionary that they have not been chromi-called anywhere (which if you have read the Kama Sutra is really astounding). It was really heart rending to see the team jump the table (eh!) at the beginning of the second half shouting "Pot one for the old Gipper!".

It was a hot and blustery night. A shot rang out. Fftt! Ahhh! The bullfrogs were at it in the patch. The tiddly winked. (In the second paragraph I draw all this together).

[sic original="Sommerville"correct="Somerville"] (Boston) walked off with the North American Continentals with consistent playing that racked up 144 points before the [sic original="weakened" pun-on="weekend"] was over. MIT seconded the effort with 136 points in all; Toronto squapped in on a Sleazy 132 points. Rounding out the scoreboard were Philadelphia (111) and Cornell (104). Waterloo the only other Canadian team to enter the finals were eliminated early Saturday morning (23-40) by Philadelphia (Hythnlbtwoc)[.]

“B” teams included a class of 6th graders from Harlem, and a class from Regis (girls school near MIT), the MIT “B” and Cornell "B” teams.

Toronto now ranks as the top Canadian tiddlywinkers team ahead of Carleton, McGill, and Waterloo.

The next official tournament by the North American Tiddly Winks Association is scheduled for the 1st week of May in Ottawa with an Open Pairs Tournament (for more information contact Byron Alexandroff (783-9207)). It is hoped that Pierre Trudeau will wink-off.

Below is a partial listing of what may be done with cockroaches.

14) WASP tiddly winks

To the Editor,

The Farcity:

I would like to recommend that you abolish the Art, Music and Drama page of The Farcity. The AM and D department serves no useful purpose in the paper and uses up space which could be used to much better advantage by the Sport's department.

With this extra space the Sports department could cover such important things as the Smart House Poker league, the House Ec Chess team, and Interfaculty Tiddlywinks.

But such is life. True heroes are never appreciated. Take me, for example. I was first string left tiddle on our high school Tiddley Winks team, and they haven't even announced varsity tryouts (in two years yet). But my day will come. I'm still keeping in practice by regular elbow bending lin the buttery, of course).

"I've been going to college long enough to learn how to be a good wife. I can discuss all things from tiddlywinks to deep dark secrets, can sing, dance, play the ukelele, chesterfield rugger, and other little things with great skill… I'm just the light-hearted kind of blonde you'd like to while away your time with—and your money. Measurements: 24 waist and 20-20 eyes—Yours in anticipation!

Signed, Lovesick Lizzy.""

Varsity had intended dressing trainer Howie Ringham for the game until it was discovered that he is an ex-professional tiddleywink player and therefore ineligible.

The company of "Katy Cruel", University College's musical show last night hurled a challene at the staff of the All-Varsity Revue "Christopher Jones".

The challenge, to contests of tiddley-winks and chess reads as follows:

"We, the people of Katy Cruel, being of sound mind and body, do hereby challenge the sound people of Christopher Jones to a public match of tiddley-winks and chess; the sound of mind to play chess, and the sound of body to play tiddly-winks.

"The place is to be the King Cole Room at at the hour of 11 p.m. on Tuesday the fifteenth day of December.

"The rules of chess will be those as originally formulated by the Chinese, while the rules of tiddly-winks will be based on the precedents created in Cambridge University versus the Duke of Edinburgh, represented by the Goons."

Christopher Jones state in their reply, "We the people of Christopher Jones, being of sounder mind and hardier constitution, accept this challenge from the people of Katy Cruel, provided that it is understood that we also use King Cole Room for its original purpose."

Several University of Toronto students waged a battle Royal in a darkened corner of the King Cole Room before Christmas.

The battlefield was a tiddly-wink board and a chess board, and the combattants were members of the University College production of "Katy Cruel" and the AVR show "Christopher Jones".

Both sides finally acknowledged tiddly-winks could not be mastered, although the cardboard game box said "a game for children from to 10".

Bill Davis, director of "Katy Cruel", managed to defeat Paul Robinson, orchestra leader of "Christopher Jones" at chess.

Commented Robinson later: "It wasn't fair. I was at a disadvantage. I couldn't see."

Lew Solmon engaged Kyle Boumanis in a game of Tiddly Winks, and Al Oenov olso engaged In the sporting activity by sharpening pencils.

It's always great to have Johnny Metras' teams playing at Varsity, whether it is football, basketball or tiddely winks. The Old Man, as he is affectionately called, is the Casey Stengel of our intercollegiate league (no reflection on Johnny's age). If we're to beat anybody, the fans and players are at their happiest if it's one of Metras' teams. It's always better to beat the top dog.

The concluding event of the weekend will be a SAC party, with, forsooth, a bevy of U of T co-eds acting as hostesses. It is not known whether the Harvard men have sufficiently recuperated from their late loss to Oxford so that a tiddliwinks match may be arranged, but one may possibly occur on Toronto's retaliatory visit to Harvard.

The early hours of the morning find the men of McNeill House residence at Queen's University intently practising a gambit which could prove a deciding factor in inter-varsity tiddly-winking.

Oh—not again.

Please, tiddlyers, stay away from Toronto; we're mod enough as it is.

Repent! Return our tiddly winks—all six sets by midnight Sunday, November 21st, or else we shall wax exceedingly wrathful.

McLean House

In other business council also: [...]

heard a letter from the University of Waterloo challenging U of T to a series of tiddly-winks matches.

With the New Year upon us it is once again time to crank up the typewriter and polish the crystal to find out what will happen in the months to come. This is a service of The Varsity sports department designed to allow students to set aside their worries about the world in general and Varsity Blues in particular to concentrate on more important endeavours such as essays and exams.

No doubt, faculty members will pass a motion commending The Varsity for this service. Neverthless, the service will probably continue—and that can qualify as the first prediction of the new year. [...]

The board of governors of the Ontario-Quebec Athletic Association will announce formation of the Senior Intercollegiate Tiddleywinks League.

The Tiddlywink team of the University of Waterloo has won the Canadian Tiddlywink championship with a crushing 86-26 victory over an out-classed squad from Waterloo Lutheran University.

The Waterloo team was formed last fall and immediately wrote to SAC, challenging U of T to form a team and compete for the national title. However, for undisclosed reasons, the powers of SAC refused to squop winks with Waterloo.

The Waterloo club is affiliated with the English Tiddlywink Association and the International Federation of Tiddlywink Associations.

It hopes to challenge for the world Tiddlywink title and the coveted Silver Wink trophy donated by Prince Philip. Both awards are currently held by Oxford University.

Tiddlywinks only mentioned in subheadline

The Engineering Society Tiddlywinks Club will hold a marathon in the Towne and Countrye Square Mall, January 19-21.

Eight participants will try to break the 56-hour record held by the University of Waterloo, and continue toward a centennial-minded 67 hours.

The purpose of the marathon is to practice for the world tiddlywinks championships at the U of W in late February.

The club is selling memberships to interested honor students to raise money for the Heart Fund.

The Engineering Society's 67-hour tiddley-wink mara-thon has been confirmed as an offical world record.

Mr. Bonham said he will attempt to have the record published in the Guinness Book of Records.

The University of Toronto tiddlywink team will travel to Waterloo Friday for this weekend's North American tiddlywink championship competitions.

They will meet competitors from Cornell University, the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Columbia University and Waterloo University for the North America Cup.

The victors will fly to England early next year to play Oxford for the world title. The prize there is the Silver Wink, donated by Prince Philip.

Earlier this year the U of T team set a world tiddlywink record by staying at the game 67 hours. This will be registered in the [sic original="Guiness" correct="Guinness"] Book of Records, say team spokesmen.

WATERLOO (VNS)—The University of Toronto tiddlywink team placed last in the North American tiddlywink championships in Waterloo last weekend.

The winning team will fiy to England early next year to play Oxford for the world championship.

The Toronto team met stiff competition from Cornell, MIT, and Waterloo universities. "The other teams all belong to clubs that practise every week," said team member Byron Alexandroff (II APSC). "Our team was put together at the last minute.

"Competing was a very valuable experience. We learned that tiddlywinks is not a trivial game. It's like chess. You have to think 10 moves in advance.

"We learned a lot by playing in the championships," Alexandroff said. "We're going to go back and take it next year."

Cornell and Waterloo were to play off for the title last night.

1 p.m.

Treasure Van official opening. Presentation of Von to U of T football team and Vain to Blue's Tiddlywinks team. Miss U of T and the Lady Godiva Memorial Band will award the cups. In front of Hart Mouse.

this may be the last time you get to read a masthead ad in peace…pray tues nite for jerry rubin's pig or drop your tears in the office as we mourn for big brother to the south, nael knows about that. we had jim laughing all the way to the press as we finished early for the first (read only) time this year. agi and pom deserted the cause for the theatah and mary went library all the way. jack spent the evening as hhh (or was he in the darkroom; we can't be sure) angelo pondered the csm and sa did trev, perly bless him. rod, we don't believe it was your sister but we do knaw it was balex's boxer (watch the news pages for develops on the tiddlywinks tourney), lyn and rosemary found it hard going and we only found space tor one brian story. bob fielded in and out and even the chevron loves us. suecup and suefeat got together for a front-pager and worried about the flat earth society, eric rump and t.a.m.f. tim went home early and so did phil, who resorted to phoning, confidential ottawa flash- kevin-take 99 7/8 of this, drop in a glass of beer- and you have a mooburger.

At 8 a.m. this morning Byron Alexandroff (III APSC) embarked on a 62-hour endurance test for Radio Varsity.

He has pledged to stay awake at his microphone until 10 p.m. Wednesday night to keep U of T's largest public address system on the air continously as it kicks off campaign to raise funds for U of T's Community Chest.

"I'm doing this totally straight," he says, "no bennies, wake up pills or dozing in between records. Just coffee."

Bryon has had experience at this kind of masochism Two years ago, he led a group of engineers in a tiddly-wink marathon and managed a centennial 67 hour worth of fine fingered trickery establishing a record. This year, he's after the World University Radio Station Non-Stop Broadcasting Record.

"I'm expecting the same sensory blast at 50 hours I got the last time — heightened sensitivity to light colours, weird noises."

How does he plan to keep awake? He'll be interviewing people—Pete Griggin of CHUM, John Wilson of CKEY. Steve Langdon—as well as announcing records, accepting dedications from those who call in, and giving away free LP's.

The purpose behind all this is the University of Toronto's Community Chest There will be an auction on Wednesday afternoon, with Miss U of T on the block, along with two dinners at Tom Jones' Steak House and two tickets to see Jacques Brel (who is reported alive and well).

Bryon will continue broadcasting from a trailer in front of University College. He welcomes everybody to come and see him, bringing friends, lovers, parents and children.

And a lovely time will be had by all, with the possible exception of Bryon.

Campus politics is tiddlywinks in comparison to the need to control pollution that the earth may be worth inheriting.

U of T's finest tiddlywinks players will travel to Ithaca, New York, this week-end to compete in the annual, invitational Tiddlywinks Championship hosted by Cornell.

Among the other schools competing are Harvard, Cor­nell, and MIT.

There will be a total of 11 teams from seven schools.

The Toronto team is sponsored by the Engineering Society which donated $75 towards travelling expenses.

The "squidgers" on the Toronto squad are Byron Alexandrof[f] (IV APSC), Barry Corbin (IV UC), Lindsey Horenblos (III New), Paul Milgram (IV APSC), Morris Cohen (IV APSC), Mel [sic original="Solomon" correct="Solmon"] (IV APSC).

"We've got a real hope of winning this yea r since most of our players have been competing for four years"", said Captain Alexandrof[f].

Twelve days ago, the U of T tiddleywinks team left unheralded for the land down under—Ithaca, New York—to make what was to be its last bid for the North American Championship.

Paul Milgram (IV APSC), Barry Corbin (IV UC), Lindsay Horenblas (HI UC), Morris Cohen (IV APSC), Bryon Alexandroff (IV APSC) and Mel [sic original="Solomon" correct="Solmon"] (IV APSC), after surviving a nasty border incident and a series of bizarre circumstances which nearly caused the team to default all its matches, put up a creditable showing, placing third in their division with 85½ points, only 8 points out of second.

Their opponents were among the best in North America: Cornell, MIT, Carleton and Somerville (who took home all the winks).

It was a nostalgic experience for all the U of T players, who had been together for three years and had competed twice before for the trophy. Five members will be lost through graduation and the future of the team is cloudy indeed. Paul Milgram broke down and sobbed convulsively as he finished his last match, while his partner futilely attempted to comfort him and at the same time hold back the flow from his own eyes.

Ten days ago, the U of T tiddleywinks team returned unheralded from the land down under—Ithaca, New York—after making what was to be its last bid for the North American Championship.

A four-year dream—to bring the trophy emblematic of the North American Tiddly winks Championship to the University of Toronto is at last within the grasp of the "Toronto Six", the unheralded U of T liddlywinks team.

During the past weekend, these players drove 250 miles to Cornell University in Ithaca. N.Y. to compete in the Western Regional Playoff that determined two of the four finalists who will compete in the "Continentals."

Veterans Bryon Alexandroff, Barry Corbin. Lindsay Horenblas, Glen Kezwer and Mel [sic original="Solomon" correct="Solmon"], aided by the strong play of rookie Wendy Levinson, played superbly against tough opposition from Cornell, McGill, Carleton and Waterloo, "squidging" and "squopping" their way to a 157½ point total.

The Toronto Six. boosted by the support of two cheerleaders, had victory at its finger-tips, so to speak but luck was not winking down at the team. Cornell trounced Waterloo in the final round, knocking Toronto from its first place position and thus nailing the coveted spot tor themselves.

But glory may yet come to the U of T should current plans to stage the February Continentals in Toronto go through. The team is hoping to bask in the full public adulation which they deserve.

Says Alexandroff, "We expect coverage from national T.V. in February of course."

WINCO STEAK N' BURGER RESTAURANTS are pleased to welcome the five visiting teams (MIT, Cornell, Waterloo, [sic original="Sommerville" corrrect="Somerville"] and Philadelphia) to the fifth annual North American TIDDLYWINKS continentals to be held in the Debates Room at Hart House, Saturday February 13 and Sunday February 14 (from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. each day). All matches open to the public at no charge.

GOOD LUCK TORONTO!!!

Toronto will be the host this weekend to five team from across Canada and the United States for the ultimate tiddlywinks competition of 1971.

The North American Tiddlywinks Continentals, which will be held in the Debates Room at Hart House tomorrow and Sunday from 9-5 each day, is the major competition for which all teams strive for representation.

Teams are expected from MIT, Cornell, Philadelphia, Waterloo and Somerville, Mass to play on the home mats of the Varsity team, the current top Canadian entry and second in the nation for individual play.

Members of the Toronto team: Bryon [sic original="Alexandroft" correct="Alexandroff"] (captain); graduate engineer Mel [sic original="Solman" correct="Solmon"]; law student Lindsay Horenblas and Wendy Levinson, Glen Kezwer and Barry" Corbin—all U of T students. Lani Nathanson is the substitute.

The rise of the popularity of tiddlywinks has been exponential since the time that it was introduced to North America approximately six years ago.

Teams have literally sprung up across the nation with expansion clubs in Montreal, Cleveland, Cali- fornia and Florida. Upwards to three teams are forming in some winking towns and playoffs are usually necessary to decide which team will be invited to attend the Continentals.

The Toronto delegation of six winkers anticipate tough competition, mostly from the Ivy-League colleges, but hope to fare well due to the hundreds of hours of practise they have accumulated.

While you other sportsies were out on the slopes, breaking your legs during Ski Week, a quiet, intense struggle was being staged at Hart House: the North American Tiddlywinks Championship.

Teams of six poured in from all over the North-Eastern U.S. and Southern Ontario for these Continentals: M.I.T., Waterloo, Somer- ville, Cornell and Hythnlbtwoc ("Hark! Yon tree hath no leaves but they will out ! - Club["])

The Toronto team, composed of Glen Kezwer, Barry Corbin, Lindsey Horenblas, Wendy Levinson, Bryon Alexandre!!, and Mel Solmon, put their talents on the line in a final bid to cop the crown after four years of frustration.

After Hyth. knocked out Water- loo in a sudden-death match, a round-robin tournament took place, each team playing 9 matches against 4 other teams. After a disheartening first round loss to Cornell, (most analysts agreed it was the "fluke" of the tourney;) Toronto settled down to play steadily improving matches, culminating in an overwhelming 40 - 23 wallop of Hyth.

But the early setback to Cornell proved to be Toronto's undoing. Defending champion Somerville played consistently to amass 144 points in 36 matches to take first (hence retaining the Trophy they left back home). M.I.T. (whom, incidentally, Toronto also trounced) stole 2nd place with 136 2/3 points to Toronto's 132 2/3. Far behind were Hythnlbtwoc with 118 and Cornell with 105.

While the Toronto six proved themselves the best in the western region, they were forced to acknowledge the eastern region's laudable mastery of the squidge, the squop and the pot. (Actually, they were just damned lucky!)

TIDDLY WINKS: anyone interested in playing, phone [sic original="Rogar" correct="Roger"] or [sic original="Goft" correct="Goff"] at 966-3857. An invitational pairs tournament will be held at the U of T In early April.

However, UC closed quickly to be down only by two at halftime. In the second half, Meds played 'straight up' basketball to hold on for the win. Lindsay Horenblas, Meds premier tiddly wink player, scored 19 points in the game to lead all Meds scorers. For UC, the brothers Betcherman—Mike and Gordie—hooped 22 and 14 points, respectively.

The Tiddlywinks Club will fly to the Silver Winks playoffs in England, even if they have to cling to the wings of a Sopwith Camel.

Student Council declared itself in favor, “in principle”, of going halves with the administration on costs, while suggesting the club seek other means of financing the flight.

Council considered the $440 tab for each winker to be too high and suggested that the club approach the RCAF, the Centennial Commission, and the Canadian Union of Students for travel aid.

The tiddlywinks club won't get much from the administration—Five dollars perhaps.

Sending a group like this on a trip abroad would be a bad precedent establish, university president J. G. Hagey felt.

He agreed however, that the club is attracting widespread publicity for the university. "This is a much more desirable way for getting publicity than pushing a bed around,“ he said, referring to the fad of intercity bed-pushing several years ago.

“Tell them I’m willing to make a personal contribution” he said.

The tiddlywinks club—North American champions—hopes to travel to England in February to compete for the Silver Wink, the international championship. Student Council has promised to match what the adminw istration will contribute.

At 8:30 in the Village dining hall is the annual general meeting of the TIDDLYWINKS CLUB.

The University of Waterloo will be celebrating its tenth birthday the week of October 22 to 29.

A ton of special events have been planned for Tenth Anniversary Week under the co-ordination of Brian Iler, civil 3A, chairman of the Tenth Anniversary Week committee. The university tiddlywinks club, defending North American champions, will host a North American tiddlywinks tournament—in Canada for the first time. Fall convocation and Homecoming are scheduled for the week.

The opening of the campus center, originally set for november 1967, was moved to february 1968; and jock news—including a tiddleywinks championship—dominated the pages.

Leslie went on to say that in the math report there were appointments of a “research associate” and a “part-time instructor” and that he wouldn’t be surprised if he turned the page to find the appointment of a “tiddlywinks professor”.

ACROSS

44. National Tiddlywinks League (abbn.)

THURSDAY

Tiddlywinks club 7:30 p.m.campus centre 217.

Tiddlywinks reared its noble head again at Uniwat last thursday.

However, the turnout at the Tiddlywinks Club’s first meeting in almost three years could hardly be called overwhelming. About ten people came to learn the game which brought this campus its only north american championship in 1966. (The club lost it again in 1967 to [sic original="Cornel" correct="Cornell"] University and has since remained inactive).

This year, the club hopes to avenge that loss, and proceed on to England for the Silver Wink championships, the Olympics of tiddlywinks.

Three veterans of the 1966 and rebuild the team to its former strength and to aid in the organization of the club. Club spokesman, Ross Bell (known throughout the winking world as the Silver Dart) expressed regret about thursday’s poor turnout, but was optimistic about the club’s future.

“I am [sic original="somehwat" correct="somewhat"] regretful about thursday’s poor turnout. but I am optimistic about the club’s future,” said Bell.

The club will be meeting again this (and every) thursday at 7:30 p.m. in cc217 for anyone who is interested in learning the science and skill of tiddlywinks.

THURSDAY

Tiddlywinks Club - eliminations for team to play at november regionals. 7:30 p.m. cc217.

This weekend, U of W’s tiddlywinks team is off to [sic original="Cornel" correct="Cornell"] university to play in the first round of the north american tiddlywinks association western division championships.

The team has been preparing itself for the past month and expects to place well in the competition. They will be playing against teams from Ottawa, Toronto, Montreal, Cleveland, as well as the host [sic original="Cornel" correct="Cornell"].

The team must do well in this and a subsequent tournament in january in order to make it to the continentals next february, where they would face stiff competition from the more established teams in Boston and New York.

Club spokesman Ross Bell expressed confidence in their ability to hold up under fire, despite the team’s relative inexperience.

“Despite the team’s relative inexperience, I have confidence in our ability to hold up under fire.”

So do we.

Amidst cries of foul and “Go squidge yourself, ” the university of Waterloo Sabre-teeth benched their top pair in the final match of the west division tiddlywinks play downs Sunday, allowing Cornell university to squeak past the university of To-ronto into first place in the tournament.

The pair, who had made a poor showing against U of T in the previous match, sat out the final round in favour of two winkers playing in their first tournament ever. Cornell had an easy time against them, as they piled up sufficient points to capture first place.

The tournament, held last weekend at Cornell, included teams from Toronto, McGill, Carleton, Cornell and Waterloo. Ottawa had gone into the tourney as favorites, but were upset by both Toronto and Cornell, and finished third. The Sabre-teeth were fourth, and McGill fifth and last.

The top two teams are now assured of berths in the north american continentals next february. A third team will be determined in january at a tournament here in Waterloo.

The Sabre-teeth had gone to Cornell expecting tough competition, and they found it. Their first match was against Carleton, and it was obvious from the start that the team’s lack of experience would severely impair their performance. They lost the match 42½-26½.

They then played against a weak, and even more inexperienced McGill squad, defeating them by a 42-21 score, their only victory of the tournament.

After losing to Toronto next, it was decided that, since a first or second was impossible, to give their least experienced players a chance to play. Cornell, needing 45 points to net first won the match 46-17.

This manoeuvre prompted the disgruntled Toronto team to attempt to restrict platooning at future meets. A motion requiring the same six players to compete in all matches received little support, as it was pointed out that such a decision could not be made without first consulting teams in the eastern division.

The Sabre-teeth, though they fared rather poorly, returned to Waterloo confident that they will be going to the continentals. Six of their nine players had never faced other teams before, but will be ready when the same teams come to Waterloo in january.

Well squop that wink with a rusty squidger. Tiddlywinks is coming to Waterloo.

Yes folk, the second round of the western regional tiddlywinks playdowns is happening right here, this weekend in the campus center pub.

The playoffs shape up as one of the big events of Borealis, i.e. winter weekend, as teams from McGill, Carleton, Case Western Reserve (Cleveland) and our very own Sabre-teeth squidge off to determine the last open spot in next month’s continental tourney in Toronto.

The tournament shapes up as a battle between the powerful teams from Carleton and Waterloo, who finished third and fourth respectively, to Cornell and Toronto in November’s playdowns at Cornell. Both teams will be out to avenge their disappointing showings at Cornell.

However, both can expect trouble from McGill, playing in only their second tournament and Case, who were unable to make it to the last matches.

Sabre-teeth spokesman, Ross Bell says that the team has been hard at it this last week, practicing for the weekend’s play, and is confident the team will be going to Toronto next month.

“The team has been hard at it this last week, practicing for this weekend’s play and I am confident the team will be going to Toronto next month,” Bell said.

The team’s chances have been bolstered somewhat by the addition of H. Shields, who played with Waterloo’s championship teams in 1966 and ‘67. He was unable to make the trip to Cornell in november and his presence here this weekend should help the '-teeth' considerably.

Other members of the team include R. Rumm, like Shields and Bell, a seasoned veteran, B. “N” Anderson, B. Jackson, R. Taylor and R. Page.

As an added feature, Saturday afternoon’s play will be a licensed event, starting at 1 p.m. in cc pub. Admission is ten cents. It will also feature a performance by Waterloo’s own super stars, the legendary Running Dog and His Elektrik Lakkeys.

Play begins Saturday at 10 a.m., and there will be matches on sunday morning if necessary.

The Sabre-teeth are hoping for your support this weekend, and the chevron encourages everyone to come out and witness the drama and challenge that is tiddlywinks. See ya there.

Displaying much of the form that led them to the north american tiddlywinks championship five years ago, the university of Waterloo Sabre-teeth on saturday resoundingly squidged themselves into this year’s continentals.

The team exhibited much more poise and confidence here than they showed last fall at Cornell where they finished fourth out of five. They defeated two fine teams from Carleton and Case Western Reserve to advance to next month’s finals in Toronto. The team from McGill was unable to make it to Waterloo.

Carleton jumped off to an early first round lead as they defeated Case 37½-25½. The ‘- teeth’ played Carleton in the second round, and the squads split the match 31½-31½.

In the final round of play, the Sabre-teeth scored a convincing 43-20 victory over Case, enough to give them the total points triumph.

Leading the ‘-teeth’ were Henry Shields and Ron Rumm who won five of their six games and finished second in individual pairs scoring, Shields and Rumm were playing together for the first time since they teamed up to lead U of W to the ‘66 championship over Harvard medical school.

Ross Bell and Brenda Wilson, who also won five of their six games, finished third. Rosie Wain and Andy Tomaszewski of Carleton placed first.

Now it’s on to Toronto for the stalwart Sabre-teeth. However, once there they must participate in a playoff with a team from Philadelphia to qualify for the fifth spot in the round-robin tourney. Other teams that will be playing in the continentals are Toronto, Cornell, MIT, and Somerville (Mass.)

Perhaps most disappointing to the small but thirsty crowd on hand for Saturday’s matches was that Running Dog and his Elektric Lakkeys were forced to cancel their scheduled appearance because of the length of time needed to complete all the matches. Perhaps a fair price to pay for Waterloo’s well-deserved victory.

Club spokesman Ross Bell, who before the match felt sure the team would win, expects the Sabre-teeth to become even more powerful and says they will be forced to be reckoned with in Toronto.

“Before the match I felt sure the team would win,” Bell said. He went on to say “I expect the Sabre-teeth to become even more powerful and we will be a force to be reckoned with in Toronto.”

If the ‘teeth’ continue to improve and play as well as they did this weekend, Waterloo may well become the resting place for the north american tiddlywinks championship once again.

Tomorrow the world?

The university of Waterloo Sabre-teeth face their biggest test ever this weekend as they travel to Toronto for the 1971 continental tiddlywinks team championships.

The team has been working out all this week in preparation for the weekend’s play and look sharper than ever. They have been improving steadily since last fall’s fourth place finish at Cornell. They won the toumament here last month, and all indications are that they could go all the way in Toronto.

Their first match is on saturday morning against HYTHNLTBWOC from Philadelphia which they must win if they are to remain in the running for the big prize. Both teams ended up third in their respective divisions and the match is a playoff to determine fifth spot in the round-robin series. Other teams competing are university of Toronto and Cornell university from the western division, and MIT and Somerville from the east. Somerville is the defending champion.

Waterloo’s chances were dimmed somewhat by the departure of Ron Rumm, a six-year veteran. However, the team’s rookies are now well-experienced and should be able to take up any slack that may result from Rumm’s absence.

The team was duly unimpressed by reports circulating out of Toronto regarding U of T’s unorthodox training program, which consists of a strict diet of grapes, carrots and milk, and daily finger exercises.

“We don’t go for that kind of shit,” said club spokesman Boss Bell, “we play tiddlywinks!”

With that kind of determination, we look for the return of the north american tiddlywinks championships to Waterloo.

Abandoning their unopened parachutes on the village green after plummeting tens of feet from an armed forces dirigible the chevron waterbabies poured themselves into the jock pool to play another game of fast paced tiddly winks. Having been immobilized by a severe case of an unnamed european disease larry burko was only able to lend immoral support.

Sean Casey (Man Environment)—It is a standard practice in student election campaigns for candidates to begin by reciting a long list of obscure and irrelevant accomplishments (such as tiddlywinks champion of Village 1 72-73) and finish with platitudes about representing students best interests ad nauseam.

The University orf Waterloo tiddlywinks club is now North American champion.

At an invitational tournament hosted by Harvard and Radcliffe in Boston last weekend. The U of W team beat Harvard, Harvard Medical, Radcliffe, and WLU to place first.

The WLU team also put up a good show and placed third having been beaten by Harvard Medical School as well as the U of W. The W.L.U. women's team made a clean sweep by beating the only other all female team put forward by Radcliffe.

Ambitious plans are presently being made for the future.

The WLU team plans to tour other Canadian colleges in order to stir up interest and stimulate competition while the U of W team is considering sending a team to Britain to compete for the world Silver Wink Trophy.

The Science-Engineering game is worthy of note. Not really, but it wouldn’t be cricket to discuss tiddlywinks under the title of hockey. Though probably more interesting.

—Hi Chris! where are you going?

—I’m off to the University Tiddlywinks Club.

—What! Tiddlywinks is a kid’s game!

—I used to think so too, Jim, until I went along once just for kicks and found it so fascinating that I started playing it myself. -You mean people take it seriously! !

—Sure they do, but it’s still a lot of fun.

—Sounds interesting, tell me more.

—Well, to begin with, U of W has the first official club in Canada. And what’s more, coaching is provided by a member of the Scottish international team.

—Good grief!

—Once we’ve got a good team we’re going to beat all the teams in the States like MIT and Harvard, and then we’ll declare ourselves champions of North America. And can you imagine Waterlootheran and U of T admitting that they can’t even provide a team to challenge us?

—Hmm. Sounds good. But you haven’t told me anything about the game yet.

—Well, the idea is to squidge your own winks into the pot, and try to squop your opponents. -What on earth does all that mean?

—Why don’t you come yourself and find out?

—Where is the next meeting? -The next meeting is Tuesday at 7:15 in the Village dining hall.

—Good. See you then.

—Right. ta-ta for now.

Pictures of campus organizations will be taken for the Compendium at the following times and places:

Monday, Jan. 10 - arts foyer.

5:30 p.m. Tiddlywinks Club

Most members of Student Council have little or no idea of what actions they have approved at their meetings.

This situation arises because most of council’s actions are made by approving minutes of the executive board or of one of the other boards of Student Council.

These minutes - often as long as eight pages - are, however, usually handed to members only minutes before they pass their approval.

Thus there is a good chance that if page seven of the board of student activities meeting listed a motion granting the Tiddlywinks Club $1,000 council would probably stamp it approved.

Admittedly some council members, Jeff Evans in particular, have been very watchful. Nevertheless the sy- stem makes a drastic error all too easy.

The remedy is simple: mail out executive board minutes a few days early. Some of the minutes handed to councillors as they go into meet- ings are well over two weeks old, there is no acceptable excuse for this delay.

It shouldn’t be too much to ask that those all-important minutes get to council members long before the chair calls the meeting to order.

The Tiddlywinks Club, after three months on campus, now has over 70 members. The big event will be the match against Harvard at the end of February.

Spurred on by our challenge, Waterlootheran has formed a team—“to warm us up on the way to Harvard,” said secretary Charlie McLeod.

Newcomers and old hands are wel- come in the Village dining hall, Wednesdays at 7:15 p.m.

The first official tiddlywinks match ever to take place in Canada will be held on Sun., Feb. 13 at 2 p.m. in the Student Village dining hall. It will be between the University of Waterloo and Waterloo Lutheran University. Spectators will be very welcome.

The match against Harvard will be on Sat. Feb. 26. There are some spare seats on the bus and anyone who wants a weekend in Boston should contact Mark Taylor, 576-1608 as soon as possible.

—The Tiddlywinks Club was given a grant of $600 for its trip to Harvard. Members of Council pointed to the fine record of the club in publicizing the university and in defeating WLU for the Canadian championship.

Sunday afternoon a strong U of W Tiddlywinks team easily overcame a plucky Lutheran team to lay undisputed claim to the Canadian title.

Club secretary Charles McLeod led a team of eight players to a solid 86-26 victory, U of W winning 14 of 16 games.

Lamentably, the club secretary blew the 16th game 1-6, his powers of concentration undoubtedly affected by the charming WLU coeds he and his partner were pitted against.

Tactics were almost invariably double-squop although Helmut Roth and Henry Shields potted out three times, winning by scores of 7-0, 5-2, and 7-0.

The greater experience of the U of W team quickly left no doubt about the final outcome, Unless Harvard has a powerful squad indeed, U of W will be the North American champs on Feb. 26.

There are still a few spare seats on the bus to Boston for the weekend of Feb. 25-28. Contact Mark Taylor, 576-1608, irnmediately if you are interested.

"We were just out-squopped,"said Michael Gottesman, president of the Gargoyle and four-year veteran of the Harvard squad.

And thus the University of Waterloo, North American Tiddlywinks Champions, left their mark on Harvard, the Ivy League college of Cambridge, Mass.

But Tiddlywinks itself started 10 years ago and 3,000 miles away in Cambridge, England when eight un-dergraduates transformed a kid’s game int the fastest-growing game on university campuses today.

What’s tiddlywinks all about?

The game, as it has developed today, is played on a six-by-three-foot felt mat. Two teammates, diagonally opposite each other, compete against an opposing pair. Each player has six winks of his particular color, four 3/8 inch and two 7/8 inch in diameter. A player may play only his own winks.

The ultimate aim is to be the first to squidge all your winks into a 2.5 inch-high pot while trying to squop the opponent’s winks.

A squop is a defe;nsive move in which a team plops one of its pieces on top of one of the opponent’s winks. Since only the top disc can be moved the covered piece is frozen until someone knocks off the upper disc.

The game is played to a time limit of twenty minutes and if at the end of this time no one has potted all their winks points are given for first, second and third places on the basis of three points for each wink in the pot and one point for each unsquopped wink outside the pot, so tactics play a major part.

At Waterloo, it all started over a pot of tea. Charles McLeod, a former tiember of the Scottish Inter- national team, John Douglas, and Mark Taylor decided on e Sunday afternoon to form a Tiddlywinks Club.

Most people laughed. So did the Board of Student Activities when we asked them to approve our constitution. So did the 64 members who joined in the first two weeks.

However, the Customs and Excise department of the Federal government didn’t laugh.

Their prompt phone call to the U of W Purchasing Department was to find out what was being smuggled in from England in the form of tiddlywinks mats and sets of discs.

The first meeting was on Nov, 17, and gradually a hard core of serious winkers formed. It wasn't long before WLU decided they could beat us at our own game, and on Feb. 13 the first official tiddlywinks game ever to ake place in Canada was held at the Village.

After a closely contested game [(]86-26). University of Waterloo walked off with the Canadian championship.

Two days later at a hastily summoned meeting of the Student Council, we were voted $600 and now nothing stood between us and a game at Harvard. Many players had practised 15 hours a week and squidged their fingers to the bone to ensure a place on the team.

On Feb, 25, two eight player teams accompanied by 24 spectators, friends, joyriders and boozers left for Boston. (WLU also managed to get there somehow)[.]

Saturday afternoon, after a sleepless 14 hour bus ride, the squad trounced an inept, overconfident Harvard University team.

After losing the first two gams while still suffering from the bus trip, the turning point came when Ross “Silver Dart" Bell and Andy Tomaino won their second game 6-1.

Sunday we met the excellent winkers of Harvard Medical School captained by former English International, Mike Crick. Crick’s playing kept the match in suspense until the final round when the U of W pulled away to win 62-50.

Highlight of the match was a two hour marathon between Chris Springer and Paul Freernan and the number one Harvardian pair. Other members taking part were John Douglas, Leroy Isaacs, and Charles Bonnycastle.

As a result of our victories the U of W are now the North American Tiddlywinks Champions. The claim to the championship has a firm basis, for, in history-making that weekend meeting, winkers from four clubs in Canada and the U.S. formed the North American Tiddlywinks Association.

I have seen our Tiddlywink Club beat Harvard’ s.

The Tiddlywinks Club is seeking a sponsor to send them to the Silver Wink competition in England.

The club has made unsuccessful applications to the administration and Student Council and now hopesthat some industry will pick up the tab in return for the publicity.

Prince Philip has donated the Silver Wink Trophy to the champions of the English Tiddlywinks Association. Our club, as present North American champions (not WLU!) wants to bring it to this campus.

Also in the club’s plans is the establishment of a Canadian league. Carleton and WLU have already expressed their support.

The coming North American competitions will probably be held here, said Ron Rumm of the club. "As champions it is our [sic original="perogative" correct="prerogative"] to say where the match will be held. Harvard can jolly well come here."

The two Harvard teams, defeated last year by a busload from Waterloo, will be invited, Both MIT and Cornell requested U of W matches.

The club has the unique distinction of actually returning a balance to Student Council last year.

The Tiddlywinks Club is holding a 54-hour marathon downtown.

A marathon winking contest started yesterday at the Waterloo Square mall, and will continue until tomorrow. The team plans to break the current world record of 54 hours of non-stop [sic original="tiddlywinds" correct="tiddlywinks"].

The team, already Canadian and North American champions, hopes to bring the Silver [sic original="Wind" correct="Wink"] to Canada during Centennial year, and this is the first step in its efforts to gain interest and the necessary funds to travel to England, said Ron Rumm, physics 3.

The Silver Wink is a trophy donated by Prince Philip to the world’s tiddlywink champions. The championships have always been held in England, with either Cambridge or Oxford the winning winkers.

If the U of W winkers can raise the necessary $4,000 to send a ten-man team in February they would be the first challengers from North America to attempt to wrest the trophy from the British.

Today

Tiddlywinks marathon continues—until?? Waterloo Square mall.

“You meet the nicest people on a Honda, but the best people play tiddlywinks" is the unqualified boast of Tiddlywinks Club chairman Mark Taylor.

I can proudly count myself one of the world’s best people now,having the broad background of one 15-minute tiddlywink match. It was undoubtedly one of the most enjoyable games I have ever played.

Being an ignorant layman, I entered the room with the inevitable snicker of one totally unfamiliar with the sport. It’s hysterical—a group of intelligent people trying to get a bunch of colored dimes into a little cup.

My snicker soon became a genuine smile of happiness as I became indoctrinated with this intriguing game.

“Initially people think of winks as a joke”, says Taylor. “However, this soon turns into a real interest.”

Moreover, interest soon becomes an almost fanatic zeal to propagate the sport. Our student winkers add to this a desire to obtain what chairman Taylor calls “instant tradition for the further glory of Waterloo”.

To gain fame for their school, the Waterloo champs are attempting to secure a sponsor willing to donate the $4,440 needed to send a ten-man team to the Silver Wink championship in Manchester, England, in February.

To demonstrateits uncontrollable energy, the club this weekend is sponsoring a 54-hour marathon contest at the Waterloo Square mall downtown to break the current world’s record for the longest match—they have to wink continuously for at least 55 hours.

Actually, an ulterior motive lurks behind this battle against sleep. The team hopes it will generate enough publicity to interest the sorely needed sponsor

Someone may realize the publicity potential in donating the necessary funds for the team to Go Forth and Wink.

The Tiddlywinks Club is suing the Coryphaeus for $4,440.

We batched up the story on their marathon in the last issue. The contest began yesterday, not last Thursday.

The $4,440 happens to be the traveiling expenses for ten tiddlywinkers contesting the world championship in Manchester, England. A sponsor for this venture has not as yet been located.

In reply to a telegram from the campus club, president Patrick Bonham of the English Tiddlywinks Association reports that the present marathon record stands at 55 hours continuous play.

The record was claimed by the Tiddlywinks Club of the Lanchester College of Technology, Coventry, Warwinkshire, England. Eight players tiddlyed as two teams under full international rules in March. The feat was accomplished on separate mats in the open air of the Coventry Shopping Precinct.

The Waterloo attempt at all-out tiddlywinking began at 10 yesterday morning in the Waterloo Square mall, and will continue until tomorrow. Hopefully, the funds necessary to send a tenman team to England to capture the Silver Wink trophy may be forthcoming from some publicity-minded spectator of the marathon.

The Silver Wink is a trophy donated by Prince Philip to the world’s tiddlywink champions. The competitions have always been held in England, with either Cambridge or Oxford the winning winkers. The Waterloo team, already Canadian and North American champions,hopes to bring the Silver Wink to Canada in February of the Centennial year.

“England, here we come! (we hope).”

A world sporting record was set Saturday at 6 p.m. by four University of Waterloo students: Ron Rumm, Andy Tomaino, Helmut Roth and Henry Shields.

They played tiddlywinks for 56 hours straight—from Thursday, October 13, at 10 a.m. until Saturday.

The main goal of the winkathon was to attract a sponsor to send ten tiddlywinkers students to the international competition in Eng-land in February. But after 56 hours of continuous playing, no sponsor appeared. $300 was raised, however, from the sale of associate memberships in the U of W Tiddly- winks Association to bemused spectators.

Two teams took part in the Winkathon. The second group played 55 1/2 hours, and thus holds the second-place championship.

When Mark Taylor, the club’s chairman and coach, was asked what would happen at 6 p.m., he re- plied, “The world’s going to end.”

With 11 hours to go, a player commented, “I’ve had forty million winks, but none of it was sleep.”

K-Mart of Waterloo supplied sandwiches, hotdogs, hamburgers and beverages. And steak was pro- vided by the AIi Baba Steakhouse.

CBC filmed portions of the marathon. The Sunday-night national news ended with an on-the-spot interview tith the Waterloo Warrior tiddlywink team, featuring an “instant replay” of a particularly spectacular squop.

Spectators varied, in number and attitude.

“They’re out of their cottonpickin’ minds,” said one onlooker.

“This is sad, sad, sad!” said another.

“Hehehehehehe,” said storeowner Ross Klopp.

Even at 3 Saturday morning the mall doors were rattling with people wanting in.

Two student guitarists sparked an impromptu hootenanny about then, helping to keep the workers awake.

“It took us until about Tuesday to recover,” Ron Rumm told the Coryphaeus.

One of the fellows had almost lost touch by hour 56. His teammates had to remind him every move what was happening and whether to squidge from the left on the right.

It has been hypothesised that if the tiddlywinks club wanted to use the mats, they would readily get them before the judo club.

To the editor:

Believe it or not, Waterloo has finally achieved fame as a great educational center, including and above all tiddlywinks.

Last night, I discovered in the Gloucester Citizen, a local newspaper, the article which I have en- closed, emphasizing the achievements of our great university.

Longlevens, Gloucester, England.

A four-man university team claimed a new world tiddlywink record in Waterloo, Ontario, Canada yesterday. They played for 56 hours breaking by one hour the previous endurance record set up by Lanchester College of Technology team, in Coventry.

The only other news from this side of the pond is the usual. That is, that the tax rates and hemline height vary directly and proportionately. Both are rising at an unbelievable rate.

BRIAN ROBBINS mechanical 2A

The German born computer scientist, who went to the U.S. with his family in 1936, believes that “computer literacy” is about as important as bicycle riding, and that much contemporary concern with the question is misplaced. Children must learn their natural language, and they must learn their history, said Weizenbaum. These are the priorities, and after they have learned these things, if there is time left over, riding bicycles, playing tennis, and tiddlywinks may be good things to teach.

3. Australian Rules Tiddleywinks (far too rough)

[Page 36] 1995 M Fayers, member, 2010 England Tiddlywinks team, victorious over the USA, in Washington DC.

[Page 39] 1960 M A C Relle, member, 2010 England Tiddlywinks team, victorious over the USA in Washington DC.

[Page 40] 1972 G Thorpe, member, 2010 England Tiddlywinks team, victorious over the USA, in Washington DC.

To celebrate its fiftieth anniversary, the club will be holding a celebratory dinner on Saturday 15 January 2005. Former players are most welcome. For details, contact Stewart Sage at Queens’ College on 01223 335607. Email: [email protected]. For other anniversary events, see www.etwa.org

Article about Prince Philip's role in tiddlywinks

But it hasn’t all been serious. Challenged to a match early on by the Cambridge University Tiddlywinks Club, the prince appointed the Goons as his royal champions, initiating a much publicised charity tournament played in March 1958 before a packed Guildhall.

‘As the royal colours,’ reported the Sunday Times, ‘the Goons wore curious long yellow cotton garments with orange, yellow and black school caps, and ties embroidered with the initials of the Royals Tiddlywinks Club 1958. Cambridge were immaculate in dinner jackets and bow-ties bearing a wink rampant.’

Illuminating but disappointing—for those of us in the Footlights in the late 70—to read the true genus of Strange Blue, the frisbee team. I had always assumed it was a brilliant chapeau to our own Hugh Laurie, whose Blackadder character, George, so movingly reminisced about the college tiddlywinks team – the Trinity Tiddlers.

Nick Miles (Corpus 1979)

ps: I thought the latest edition was a cracker.

One of Cambridge’s least known and least publicised sports (I use the term sport here and hereafter in a somewhat loose and vague sense) is also, bizarrely, one of its most successful, and that sport is tiddlywinks. No other sport, perhaps activity, in Cambridge can boast of only ever losing three Varsity matches since its conception and standardization in Cambridge in 1955.

I’m sure as children we were all enticed by the jovial multicoloured ‘winks’ and passed many a happy carpet-bound hour trying desperately, and again and again, to get the infuriating little blighters into the pot, a task which I always was, and still am, convinced is the difficult side of impossible. But how far does this youthful exuberance compare with the fiercely contested sport of Tiddlywinks, which some of us have come to know and love? Well, to be perfectly honest, the answer is very closely and, at the same time, practically not at all.

So first, the essential similarities: much like the rather aimless potting of ‘kiddy winks’, the ultimate aim of tiddlywinks is to put all of your winks in the pot, to score the highest possible number of points over the opposition. As with kiddy winks, there are four colours of wink, blue, green, red and yellow, each playing in alphabetical colour order and possessing two larger and four smaller winks. The game is either played as singles or pairs, with either one player controlling two colours, red and blue playing together against green and yellow, or a pair controlling a colour each. It is with the introduction of this level of organisation that the game begins to feel somewhat different to the milling free-for-all that is kiddy winks. From here on out, the differences only magnify. The sheer detail of different types of shots that are officially recognised goes way beyond what I, at least, remember from the games of my youth. I am sure I would never have celebrated pulling off a simple ‘squop’, even less likely a perfectly executed ‘boondock’ or a tactically essential ‘John Lennon Memorial Shot’, but now, both playing, and then celebrating, these shots has become almost second nature. The joy felt after a successful pot out attempt and a 7*-0* score line, the highest possible in tiddlywinks, can only be matched by, well, lots of things probably, but nothing I can think of off the top of my head in my current winks-induced trance…

Which leads me nicely on to the single biggest difference between kiddy winks and ‘real’ winks: beer. Or cider if you’re not a real man. Or diet coke if nothing else can fuel your desperate phosphoric acid fix. At many, if not all, tiddlywinks tournaments, many of which even provide points towards a world ranking, the winks playing takes a backseat to the activities of ‘lunch’, I use inverted commas as the traditional intake of food is not the main purpose of the ‘meal’. Lunch tends to start when everyone, or at least most people, are bored of winks, and therefore is often talked about from the first round of a tournament onwards, culminating in a stop of play at around one o’clock and the beginning of lunch. This beginning consists, usually, of some gentler VDGs (Violent Drinking Games, the violent referring to the level of drunkenness, not necessarily any actual physical abuse of anything other than the liver) and a general rest from the rigours of winking. These gentler games are followed by something a little more violent, possibly a journey from drinking Blackjack, through to SEPTIC hold ‘em, in effect bastardized drinking Texas hold ‘em, and possibly finishing with Tøppen, a particularly lethal variation of whist, originating in Holland and using a shortened pack, with a ten as the highest card, going down to seven, then cycling through the picture cards. After a few hours of activities of this ilk, some actual food may be partaken in, followed by, I’m sure you can see where this is heading, more VDGs. The afternoon winks are, then, usually of a more interesting but less talented standard than the fare of the morning, leading to frequent underdog upsets, particularly if a high-seeded player had less than ideal lunchtime poker hands. After all the games have been played, at least all the games that people can be mutually bothered to contest, play, as it were, moves to a pub for, yes, more VDGs and perhaps some food if desired or needed by any of the players to absorb their ‘fines’.

And so to answer the question of how similar tiddlywinks and kiddy winks are, the answer must be not very, at least not until there is a fairly major overhaul to licensing laws or children start challenging each other to perform a Penhaligon or a six inch Bristol. And as for the question ‘Winkers: Real Men or Real Menace?’ I think we all know that the answer can only be Real Men before VDGs and Real Menace after. Unless they drink cider.

For more information about Tiddlywinks, or even to try your hand at the game, come along to the ‘Fresher’s Squash’, to be held in the Queen’s College Erasmus Room on the 24th of January, starting at 8:00PM.

Or, alternatively, you could visit the classic www.cutwc.net or even the quite delightful www.bbc.co.uk/dna/ h2g2/classic/A178634

G17 Cambridge University Tiddlywinks Club

Although widely associated with rainy childhood afternoons, Tiddlywinks is a serious competitive sport.

Sarah Knight, a PhD student from Selwyn College and part-time tiddlywinks enthusiast told TCS more: “We practise one evening a week for a couple of hours, but never for so long that we can’t make it to the bar for a few swift pints afterwards...”

And what about the rules? “Well, it’s quite a complicated game! No, really. The little plastic counters – these are the “winks” – come in 4 colours: red, blue, green and yellow. You can either play doubles or singles. In a doubles game, there are 4 players who divide into teams of 2, and each person plays one colour. In a singles game, the partnerships remain, but 2 people play 2 colours each.

“The winks are moved around the mat using a bigger plastic counter – the “squidger” (again, really) – and, just like the kids’ version, there’s a pot in the middle. But unlike the kids’ version, the game isn’t entirely about getting the winks in the pot. Instead, it’s more about building up tactical areas on the mat and bringing your opponent down.

“Games last roughly half an hour, and at the end of the game, the winks that are in the pot are worth 3 points, or “tiddlies”, and uncovered winks on the mat are worth 1 tiddly.”

Overall,how would you describe Tiddlywinks? “We like to think of it as a cross between snooker and chess.”

It is as much a Cambridge stereotype as punting, bad nightlife and the snobbish (thanks to the Daily Mail). But this society is far more real than one might think at first. The game is perhaps best known as one played by children, whereby the objective is to flick all of one’s smaller counters (“winks”) into a pot, by the use of a larger counter (called a “squidger”). So far, so simple.

But, as the students at the Cambridge club can tell you, this is no child’s sport. The adult’s game emphasizes a rule that is found in the junior version, namely that should a wink land upon another wink, the lower wink cannot be played. Thus begins a game of devious tactics and high drama. The club itself is also one of a very social nature: pub crawls abound and the members are extremely welcoming.

Moreover, no other sport can match the thrashing that the Light Blues gave Oxford in the 2013 Varsity Match: 106- 6. No wonder the club has produced so many world champions of the noble sport!

The society meets Wednesdays at 7.30pm in the Selwyn’s Tower Room.

Our annual Varsity quiz against our Oxford counterparts, Taruithorn, and a variety of eclectically named events and traditions (the May Week croquet match against the Tiddlywinks Society being of particularly vital importance, plus the foreyule feast) give us very much our own calendar and subculture as a Cambridge geek society.

Did you know that you can get a quarter blue in tiddlywinks? Nicky Collins (world ranking: 72) tells us about the intricacies of the sport.

So, how difficult is tiddlywinks?

Of course, when I mention tiddlywinks many people assume I am talking about the game they played as a child: icking small plastic counters (winks) into a pot using a larger plastic disc called a squidger. The adult’s game is based on this concept, but additional elements make it somewhat more sophisticated.

The main premise of the game is to score as many points, known as tiddlies, within the allocated time. Three tiddlies can be scored for every wink in a pot, and one tiddly for every wink that is not squopped (whereby one wink is on top of another). Ultimately tiddlywinks is a game of intense strategy and skill.

How often do you train?

CUTwC meet once a week on a Wednesday in the Tower Room at Selwyn College. Practice is followed by a plentiful supply of drinking games in the bar until closing time (a key pastime of any great winker).

What’s your favourite move?

It’s a tossup between a pile ip shot and a John Lennon Memorial shot.

What’s our Varsity Record?

As far as I am aware, we have only lost to Oxford once. The most recent Varsity match was a record breaking victory and earned all those who played quarter blues in the sport.

To quote the club’s constitution: ‘[The purposes of the Club are] to play and beat Oxford University Tiddlywinks Society, should it exist, at least once a year.’

Do you think it should be considered a sport?

It is a sport.

More information: www.cutwc.org

‘[The purposes of the Club are] to play and beat Oxford University Tiddlywinks Society, should it exist.’

38. Pretend to be an expert at something you’ve never done before
Oh yes, I know all about Tiddlywinks and agrology for that matter.

78. Get a quarter blue for Tiddlywinks
Apparently it gets pretty serious in the upper echelons.

30. Get a blue

Unfortunately, at the moment of writing, you can't get a blue for RAG raiding, so if you want to fulfil this challenge, you're going to have to get creative. The phrase beg, borrow or steal springs to mind; but there are ways for the unfit and uncoordinated to earn sporting glory. Apparently tiddlywinks gets pretty serious in the upper echelons - to the extent that the most committed tiddlers can earn a quarter blue. So keep an eye out for them at the freshers' fair.

Do you guys think I should take up tiddlywinks or Buffy the Vampire Slayer society?

Both exist, by the way. My advice for clubs and societies is similar to that for your workload or friendships: experiment, then settle down. It can be tempting to immediately throw yourself into one society to start climbing its ranks, but this is a mistake.

Even the most innocent of societies like Tiddlywinks or something can’t just mere stress-outlets, because people want committee positions and CV content.

Professor Wilkes added; ‘I was flattered to be invited by Patrick Barrie to give an illustrated talk on my reminiscences of early days in the department. Being of a certain age (OK, I’m 83!), I wanted to ensure that the slide ruler was reunited with the CEB Department, so after my talk I presented it to Patrick. He’s the ideal recipient—Deputy Head of Department (Teaching), recipient of a Pilkington Prize for Excellent Teaching, and World Tiddlywinks Champion. I have been welcomed back graciously into the CEB Department, which I hope will continue to thrive’.

1954 Year Group Representative Mr Lawford Howells writes: An issue of The Spectator magazine in late 1957 had an article headlined ‘Does Prince Philip Cheat at Tiddlywinks?’. For the Cambridge University Twiddlywinks [sic] Club, founded in 1955 by Bill Steen, Lawford Howells and Brian Tyler from Christ’s, together with three other undergraduates from Trinity and Pembroke, this was like manna from heaven. What an opportunity!

Without delay a letter was sent to the Duke of Edinburgh, regretting that there should be any doubt as to his integrity when playing this noble sport, and proposing that this rumour be scotched once and for all by playing a challenge match against the CUTwC. Prince Philip accepted the idea and, as was the custom of royalty in the past, he nominated champions to represent him. The champions chosen were from the Goons – a team with Spike Milligan as captain, ably, and usually hilariously, assisted by Harry Secombe, Peter Sellers, and others associated with the popular radio comedy programme.

The Royal Tiddlywinks Tournament took place in the Guildhall, Cambridge, on 1 March 1958, before a crowd of six hundred spectators.

The picture accompanying this piece was taken on 1 March 2008, at a Royal Tournament arranged to commemorate the fiftieth anniversary of the Goons match. It shows five members of the CUTwC team who played in 1958, sporting their old, somewhat moth-eaten CUTwC ties. For this recent contest, the Duke of Edinburgh chose the Savage Club, London, as his champions. It was a very spirited and closely fought encounter, with the CUTwC prevailing in the end.

As in the Goons match, the event finished with a rousing rendering of the Tiddlywinks Anthem, as with the previous occasion, proceeds went to the Duke of Edinburgh’s charity.

Emeritus Professor William (Bill) Steen elected a Fellow Commoner in 2010

He writes: “It is something of a dream come true to become a Fellow of this College. Since birth the College has been part of my life; my father, S. W. P. Steen, walked to Christ’s daily bringing home news of the College. In 1952 I did my National Service as an RAF pilot. I started by flying Harvards around the Rocky Mountains in Canada and finished flying Meteors around Lincolnshire and Yorkshire. I spent four exhilarating years as a student at Christ’s studying Chemical Engineering and starting the Cambridge University Tiddlywinks Club with fellow 1954 matriculands – Lawford Howells (now year rep for 1954), Brian Tyler, Ian Pascoe and Roger Parker and others. After graduating I participated in the design and building of the world’s first continuous brewing plant. I married Margaret in 1960 and we went to Bengal in 1963 with the Methodist Missionary Society to lecture in Industrial Chemistry at a rural University College. We returned in 1965 and I joined the Metallurgy Department of Imperial College and lectured in Process Metallurgy. I had a spell in East Africa working for the United Nations advising on chemical industries for the East African Community. My research at ICST involved building my own CO2 laser in 1967 and was consequently awarded a BOC/SERC grant to do research. I wrote one of the first textbooks on “Laser Material Processing” in 1991, now in its 4th edition, and Liverpool University offered me “The James Bibby Chair of Engineering Manufacture”. I was invited to give laser courses around the world in Spain, Chile, Brazil, USA, China, India and South Africa as well as the UK, and asked to advise the governments of Sweden, Canada, Taiwan, and Japan on growth areas in laser processing and lead a group of scientists viewing laser work in the Japan and Korea. In 1995 I was elected as the first President of the Association of Industrial Laser Users (AILU), of which I was a founder member; in 1996 The Laser Institute of America presented me with the Schawlow Award for services to laser material processing and the University of Vigo in Spain named a laboratory after me. In my retirement the Goldsmiths’ Company, of which I am a Liveryman, uses me on their technical committee promoting apprenticeships in jewellery and precious metal work. It has also been good to serve the College as Editor of the Magazine between 2001 and 2006 and to now catalogue the College’s picture and photograph collection.

[Page 2] This issue of The Fountain is largely about time. [...] Charles Relle represents time extended, possibly the world’s longest-serving international sportsman, if Tiddlywinks be a sport.

TIDDLYWINKS

By Charles Relle

Last year three members of Trinity— Matthew Fayers (1995), Geoffrey Thorpe (1972) and Charles Relle (1960), all experienced international players— were in the eight-man English team that, at an away match in Washington, beat the USA at Tiddlywinks by125 points to 99, so shaming England’s World Cup footballers. Matthew and Geoffrey, like many tiddlywinks players, read Mathematics; Charles, exceptionally, read Classics.

The world’s first Tiddlywinks Club was founded at Cambridge in1955 by eight students, two of them Trinity men, who thought that a Blue as well as a degree was useful in seeking a job. Not being sporty types, they had to invent a game—and their number, eight, became the size of a university or international team.

Tiddlywinks, once a children’s pastime, requires strategic thought as challenging as Bridge or Chess. And it is fun to stir incredulity by announcing, ‘I play Tiddlywinks for England.’

Charles Relle (1960).To learn more about the English Tiddlywinks Association visit www.etwa.org.

Report that Patrick Barrie and Ed Wynn are the tiddly wink world pairs winners.

Feature mentioning that the current world champion at tiddlywinks is Cambridge lecturer, Patrick Barrie.

Cambridge University Tiddlywinks Club, founded in 1955, is facing closure due to apathy.

President: Alan Harper

Secretary: Matthew Adams

Treasurer: [note="none listed"]

President: Alan Harper

Secretary: [note="none listed"]

Treasurer: [note="none listed"]

This year Queens' winkers have been busy organising a weekend of celebrations commemorating the 50th Anniversary of the invention of the modern game. During the weekend Queens' hosted the Cambridge Open, which was an extremely strong international tournament including virtually all of the world's top 30 winkers as well as many older faces from the early days of the game. Although Queens' Tiddlywinks Club may have been busy organising tournaments, we've also been winning them too, with Dr Stew Sage triumphing in the National Handicapped Individual Pairs and Dr Nick Inglis playing with the victorious group in the National teams of four. Also with Dr Anthony Horton and Alan Harper being part of the winning Varsity Match team, it has been a successful year again for Queens' winkers. Hopefully this year will see the resumption of Cuppers with King's and Caius fielding sides capable of overthrowing the dominance of Queens' in this sport.

1996 began rather quietly for Qu.Tw.C, its members contributing more to the University club than organising activities in the College. The club did manage, however, to organise a very successful bop in early May. The profits from this have enabled us to purchase an enviable collection of equipment. Qu.Tw.C. has had a very disappointing year recruiting novices, possibly the result of some poor singing at the squash, hence the active membership is currently low. We therefore invited other colleges to compete in our annual fiddled handicap tournament, this year the Sir Nicholas Scott (get drunk and fall over). As tradition demands, it was not at all clear who actually won.

It was another strong year for Qu.Tw.C. members' achievements. At Easter the current president, Andrew Dominey, won the Scottish National Pairs with old Queensman, Alisdair Grant. More recently, old members Geoff Myers and Matthew Rose won the English National Pairs, but unfortunately Geoff was unable to retain the World Singles title, losing to an American challenger. Queens', as ever, provided a splendid 5 of the victorious Varsity Match team of 8 (Ed Wynn, Rupert Thompson, Andrew Dominey, Andrew Young and David Clarkson).

The college Tiddlywinks Club has unfortunately had another quiet year with few activities - just the usual cuppers win (Queens' A: David Clarkson, Andrew Dominey, Stewart Sage and Rupert Thompson) - and poor undergraduate recruitment. Members again seem to be focusing their efforts more on the University Club. This did not impair current members' performances in tournaments, however. In March, Andrew Dominey won the Oxfordshire Open and soon after with David Clarkson, jointly won the Scottish National Pairs, a tournament now dominated by Qu.C.Tw.C. winners.

In traditional fashion, former Qu.C.Tw.C. players also excelled at the National Tournaments. Geoff Myers and Matthew Rose retained the National Pairs, David Clarkson and Richard Moore were in the winning side at the National Teams of Four and no fewer than seven former Qu.C.Tw.C. players qualified for the National Singles final, most notably Stewart Sage, who had not achieved this feat since 1987! Queens' provided slightly fewer of the Varsity Match team than in recent years, hindered slightly by a policy to field first year players! Tim Hunt and Andrew Young did play.

1997-98

• Captain: James Hopgood
• Secretary: Andrew Dominey
• Treasurer: Tim Hunt

Another quiet year for the college Winks Club, although there have been strong showings by members at University and national level. Our Junior Treasurer, Alan Harper, was President of the Cambridge University Tiddlywinks Club (CUTwC) for 2001-2. In February he captained a victorious Varsity Match Team, of which half the players were members of QuCTwC (Anthony Horton, Matthew Adams, Matthew Harper and Alan Harper). Stewart Sage, Senior Treasurer of the Club, was part of the Ferrets, the winning team in the Wessex Cup.

Ed Wynn retained the World Pairs title (with Patrick Barrie); Ed and Patrick have held the title since March 2000. Ed was also the joint winner of the London Open with former Qu.Tw.C player, Matthew Rose, and won the National Individual Handicapped Pairs, in November. Matthew Rose won the National Singles tournament in October.

It's been another quiet year for Qu.T.W.C. with Cuppers being uncontested again. Next year holds more hope due to a small resurgence of the University Club. However this lack of College activity hasn't meant our members have been inactive, with Dr Stewart Sage, Dr. Nick Inglis and Alan Harper all playing in this year's National Singles final and Alan and Matthew Harper representing the University in the Varsity Match. Hopefully this year we shall be a bit more active and successful.

This year Queens' winkers have been busy organising a weekend of celebrations commemorating the 50th Anniversary of the invention of the modern game. During the weekend Queens' hosted the Cambridge Open, which was an extremely strong international tournament including virtually all of the world's top 30 winkers as well as many older faces from the early days of the game. Although Queens' Tiddlywinks Club may have been busy organising tournaments, we've also been winning them too, with Dr Stew Sage triumphing in the National Handicapped Individual Pairs and Dr Nick Inglis playing with the victorious group in the National teams of four. Also with Dr Anthony Horton and Alan Harper being part of the winning Varsity Match team, it has been a successful year again for Queens' winkers. Hopefully this year will see the resumption of Cuppers with King's and Caius fielding sides capable of overthrowing the dominance of Queens' in this sport.

Dr Stewart Sage has decided to move on after 19 years as a Fellow of Queens’. He has been a most successful supervisor in Physiology for medics and vets and also natural scientists as well as serving as Director of Studies for Biological Natural Sciences. He has for many years been a Tutor for Graduate Students and for most of that time masterminded graduate admissions. He has also been a high profile member of successive May Ball Committees and was a stalwart supporter (both as a singer, as an organiser and in his undergraduate days as an instrumentalist) of the St Margaret Society. His exploits as an internationally-ranked tiddlywinks player are legendary. He will be sorely missed and the College wishes him well in his new post as a Fellow of Selwyn College.

In January the Tiddlywinks Club kicked off another busy and successful year with the Cambridge Open tournament and the annual dinner, which was held in the Armitage Room. Queens’ hosted two major tournaments in April: both the world and national pairs. The Varsity Team made a victorious trip to Corpus Christi College, Oxford, and won 80–32. Queens’ students Alan Harper, Serita Rana and Toby Wood were amongst those who returned from the Oxford match with quarter blues. Queens’ winkers ended the academic year in style with a ‘garden’ party on the rooftop of the Erasmus Building.

Officers of the Clubs 2006-7

Tiddlywinks

Captain/President: Serita Rana

Council granted permission for Channel 5 to film members of the University Tiddlywinks Club in the Old SCR on the late afternoon of Wednesday 11 June. Dr Sage gave assurance that he would make the crew aware of the need not to cause disturbance in the Court and outside the Porters’ Lodge.

26th February-1st March

8pm, Chadwick room Selwyn College

Tues-Thurs £5/7 Fri-Sat £6/8

Book online at http://www.themightyplayers.co.uk

Boasting a talking cat, tiddlywinks champion, rebellious fellows and unpersuasive heathens this hilarious tale follows Alice, our fresh-faced heroine as she encounters the strange and mysterious Cantabridgian world.

Foremost a Fresher's tale of formals and fellows, Facebook and fire-alarms, we explore Alice's hopes, insecurities and potato-hurling habits in some mind-blowing musical numbers. Jim and Kate-her squabbling college parents, the dictatorial master, an elusive porter and the Bishop himself all impact upon whether Alice will ever truly fit in. Brought to you by 'The Mighty Players', who had recent success with 'The Zoo Story' at the ADC theatre, we hope to bring the real life and soul of Cambridge to the stage in an all singing all dancing form. This is not just a musical. This is Selwyn The Musical.

The Mighty Players are pleased to announce the premiere this brand new musical written about life in Selwyn by students at Selwyn. Produced to coincide with the 125th anniversary, we invite all students, alumni, fellows and porters to come and enjoy the show. For more information please contact Anna Seeley ([email protected])

Our society will introduce you to a sport requiring skill, concentration, tactical awareness, nerve and most importantly, a sense of fun. You will receive first class tuition from world and national champions and many of our members go on to play in our annual Varsity match against Oxford, gaining a coveted quarter-blue. When not playing "winks", we are a very sociable society and can often be found on pub crawls, in a bar playing drinking games, on punt trips or at club dinners, with all members welcome to join in these and many other merriments.

• E-mail: [email protected]
• Category: Quirky - different and unusual
• Registered: Yes

About the 17th varsity match.

About CUTwC loss to Southampton

Article about Babycham and Guinness drinks supplied for Goons match (cited in Winks Rampant)

A Cambridge admissions tutor denied rumours this week, following an article in The Guardian, that a person might gain a place in the university solely on the ground that he or she was a tiddleywinks champion, writes Jonathan Marsh.

When the opportunity arose to write a column with a hedonistic slant I felt relief; I always knew that the wild and frivolous hours of my youth spent amassing and archiving Mexican postage stamps from the 1860s would provide useful material for something. Even as I write this I sprawl naked upon a divan, nude except for a shower of collectable tiddlywinks, while Michael, the Chief Executive of Stanley Gibbons, shyly feeds me grapes.

[Professor Mary] Beard is also blessed with an endearing willingness to try anything that results in excellent television: during the episode she plays a game of Tiddlywinks on some ancient stone and at one point actually lies down in the dirt to assess the spaciousness of a room in the Ancient Roman equivalent of a high rise apartment block.

The legendary Boat Race is televised worldwide, and thousands of fans from each side make the pilgrimage to Twickenham each year to watch the Varsity rugby match. But some of the most popular sports at Cambridge rely less on power and athleticism, and more on delicate control or complex strategy. It’s time to take a look at the differing fortunes of some of Cambridge’s indoor sports and games. [...]

Last but not least, Cambridge also plays host to surely the nation’s proudest and most venerable university tiddlywinks club. The club was founded in 1955, and organizes contests for a number of curiously named trophies (like the Muscovy Duck Trophy, or the University Drunken Mixed pairs). Proving they’re (reasonably) serious about what they do, the Varsity tea&mdashl;the Quarter Blue—take on Oxford at their distinctive, deceptively technical game. They also enter national tournaments. According to the club’s website, Cambridge University is home to the reigning British men’s singles champion, Dr. Patrick Barrie.

I am a Cambridge alumnus, artist, designer, and openly trans person. My transition was from a female identity to a male one, and I went through it during my time at Cambridge. [...]

For good measure, I also joined the less-physically-demanding Tiddlywinks society. A sport of skill and dexterity (which often eluded me), I earned my ‘Quarter-Blue’ by beating Oxford. I figured if you are going to ‘do’ Cambridge, you might as well do it properly!

What links baton twirling, hovering, bridge, lifesaving and tiddlywinks? It turns out that they are all sports. In Cambridge, lifesaving, chess and Frisbee are all half blue sports, with tiddlywinks just trailing at quarter blue status. How did this happen? How are they sports? [...]

Cambridge has its own way of classing what a sport is or at least what sporting activities deserve the recognition of the student body: the blues system. A quick glance at the list of which sports are blues sports will bring up the obvious: football, rugby, hockey, tennis, and rowing. It’s in the half blue section that there are some surprise finds: try lifesaving, chess and Frisbee. Quarter blue status has also been awarded to tiddlywinks. Cambridge is a place famous for prioritising intellectual activity over any other, but can it really go so far as to call these activities sports and give them a blues status? How competitive can lifesaving really be; surely everyone would want everyone else to win to prevent, well, death? [...]

The lack of physical exertion is a theme which continues with tiddlywinks. But Nicky Collins, a committee member of the Cambridge University Tiddlywinks Club, argues that this isn’t an issue: “To be a world-class sports player requires multiple things: commitment, talent and desire to win. These are, of course, all qualities which a tiddlywinker must possess. Matches are won or lost not on the physical fitness of the players, but on the strategy and skill they display.” Does it bear any resemblance to any other sport? “I like to think of winks as a game with the tactical and strategic qualities of chess combined with the technical skill of basketball.” And what is this legendary quarter blue status that no other sport seems to possess? “The quarter blue status is unique to tiddlywinks and something which is over 50 years old.” There’s even quarter blue stash! Nicky, however, still has yet to receive his invitation from the Hawks Club. [...]

Our perception of sport is influenced, more than anything else, by what the public deems sport-worthy. Sometimes, the inherent nature of the sport is trivial when compared to the effect the sport’s history, popularity and coverage has on our judgement of it. Could we truly be sure that football would enjoy the same status within sport were it not for the fact that it dominates the back pages and that it’s played in every school in the country? What would happen if we played competitive tiddlywinks at our secondary schools?

Interview with Donnacha Kirk, President of the Cambridge University Tiddlywinks Society

This week, Winston interviewed Donnacha Kirk (DK), the one and only undergraduate member of the university Tiddlywink society, and thus by default its President. We found the President a little worse for wear, glazed eyes and drinking vodka out of a toothmug, Winston feared that like many top athletes he had finally buckled under the pressure of the game
and intense lifestyle, but apparently his state was due to spending eight hours in a dark room with sub atomic particles.

Why is Tiddlywinks better than any other university sport?

It is the only game that combines a high level of physical skill and mental agility, both of which are essential to become a champion Winker. It is the only sport that allows you to have a

quarter blue (maybe that means they have jackets in a rather fetching check pattern, hmm). Also those who play are the biggest drunks in the world, each session involves drinking games that last roughly three times as long as each training session.

What has been your proudest Tiddlywink moment?

Beating Oxford because they failed to turn up, so becoming varsity champion by default and making it for the first time in to the top 100 winkers. The 50th anniversary dinner was pretty good, having to give a speech to the american and Canadian delegation, and telling the traditional president’s joke about wanking behind boulders. Actually I think the best would have to be being rung up by Richard and Judy to be interviewed about the Sport of Kings.

For ignorant people, could you give a brief outline of Winking rules? (the president explained these enthusiastically, with hand gestures).

You have teams of two. There are winks (little counters) and a pot, (a pot), and a squidger (for flipping the winks). There are two basic moves, potting (where you try and get it into the pot), and squopping (covering your opponent’s wink). That's where the strategy comes in. There are other moves as well, the boondock, the penhalligon and the John Lennon memorial shot.

Who do you respect most in the world of Tiddlywinks?

Dr Nick Inglis, a fellow here who invented the John Lennon Memorial shot. He also appeared on Blue peter as the only person who can squop nurdled winks

What qualities do you need to be a good Winker?

You must be male, fat, with a beard, over 40, and wear glasses. Studying Maths is a help, and you need to be able to consume three pitchers of real ale at a sitting without losing winking accuracy.

How would you explain the decline of Cambridge Tiddlywinking?

As a society it has a long and illustrious history, we’ve played the Goons and a select team of MPs in the House of Commons. Our patron is Phil the Greek, who presented the Silver Wink (trophy) to the society. It is also the most successful varsity sport. But the membership have discovered that playing winks and then drinking a is a lot less fun than just drinking, so now they just drink a lot rather than winking. But our undergraduate members have doubled this year (now a grand total of two), so I am sure that we are on the upward swing again.

2nd year Natsci

Close friend and next-door neighbour of Winston Editor. Has appeared in many plays around Cambridge, most recently ‘Oxygen’. Is currently working on several directorial projects (alongside Winston Editor). Also President of Cambridge Tiddlywinks Society and member of Cambridge Gaelic Football team.

Patrick Barrie: from studying Natural Sciences, to researching spectroscopy, to teaching Chemical Engineering and, throughout, playing tiddlywinks.

I first came to Emmanuel College as an undergraduate in 1984 to study Natural Sciences. I was attracted to Cambridge by the flexibility that the course offered, having always done well in maths and the sciences at school, but not having a clear idea of any career. I was attracted to Emmanuel because, even then, the College had a reputation for friendliness as well as academic excellence. I ended up specialising in chemistry, which came as something as a surprise to those who thought I was better at maths and physics.

During my final year as an undergraduate, I attended some seminars describing how recent advances in NMR spectroscopy enabled solids, rather than just liquids and solutions, to be studied. Either the subject matter, or the speaker’s enthusiasm for the topic, struck a chord with me. I therefore stayed on at Emmanuel and Cambridge to obtain a PhD in Physical Chemistry. My research area was using NMR spectroscopy to study new families of porous solids that had potential applications as catalysts. I was particularly proud of my synthesis and characterisation of one named SAPO-34, a catalyst that is now used commercially in methanol-to-olefin synthesis.

After completing my PhD, I was awarded a research fellowship at University College London where I continued to work on solid-state NMR spectroscopy for four years. I looked at a whole variety of systems using this technique and published results in a number of different areas, including materials science, biochemistry and palaeontology as well as various branches of chemistry.

Approaching 30 years old, I faced a career choice – academia or industry. The result of a few tentative applications was appointment to a lectureship in Chemical Engineering at Cambridge in 1995. The application was hesitant because I knew very little about chemical engineering, but the position had the attraction that it guaranteed that I would learn something. Indeed, I can now speak authoritatively about most, but not all, aspects of the discipline. I am a Chartered Engineer, who can think about large-scale processing, as well as being a Chartered Chemist who can think about molecules.

My research area has changed since my move back to Cambridge. I investigate the behaviour of molecules in porous solids. This involves trying to understand adsorption, diffusion and reaction in porous solids, using both experimental and modelling approaches. The potential applications are in the fields of applied catalysis and gas separations. I also spend time developing methods for obtaining physically meaningful parameters on catalysts from experimental data. These parameters can then be used to model catalytic processes and predict performance under a full range of operating conditions.

I have always enjoyed teaching. I tutored A-level maths before I started University, supervised undergraduates during my PhD, and taught at University College London before becoming a lecturer in Cambridge. Being able to think of ways to explain awkward concepts is an important skill both as a lecturer and as a supervisor. I am a Fellow of the Higher Education Academy and was awarded a Pilkington Prize in 2008 by the University for excellence in teaching.

For Emmanuel College, I have been Director of Studies in Chemical Engineering since 1996, was made a bye-fellow in 2004, and became an official fellow in 2007. For the University, I am currently the Deputy Head (Teaching) of the Department of Chemical Engineering and Biotechnology. This means that I have major role in all aspects of teaching including developing the syllabus, implementing quality assurance procedures, mentoring staff and liaising with students.

Among my hobbies is the noble sport of tiddlywinks. I first started playing when I joined the student society when I was an undergraduate, little knowing that this would be the one activity that I would continue with throughout my life. I compete in national tournaments and have even managed to win the occasional world championship title.

I have often wondered if the rank abundance of indoor games, which are played in these days, is a modern affliction, or coaeval with the human race. To the former view I incline as an optimist; for to look on it as a perpetual heritage is a dreadful thought. Visions of the Cave-men playing Tiddley-winks, and the awful quarrels that must have ensued; thoughts of whole dynasties of Eameseses at their nightly Old Maid:—such things are enough to draw the fiend Despondence to him who looks into the future of the human race.

Jeremy Stockbridge

Electrical and Electronic Engineering 1966, MSc DIC Mechanical Engineering 1970

On the domestic side, I met Christine playing tiddlywinks at Maria Assumpta. We settled in Surbiton and have never moved!

Another incident occurred a week later, when these far-flung members of I.e., the Silwood residents, having tired of pranks with Royal Holloway College, challenged Bedford College to a Tiddleywinks Match. An outstanding victory was recorded.

The President announced that Sunday, January 21st, 1962 was to be a Sport Day against R C S with 5 rugger, 4 Soccer, 2 Hoc- key, 2 Darts, 2, Dominoes, 2 Bridge, 2 Chess and 1 Tiddlywinks teams from each college. Kick off /bully off/ middle-for-diddle /first drop/ opening bid /first move/ first squidge was to be at 2.15 p.m. The contests were to be kept to departments as much as possible.

ULU Freshers' days, Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday. October 10th, 11th,12th.

For a plan of the building see your ULU Handbook: Societies' stalls are distributed as follows:—

First floor—room 1B

21. Winks Society

The second Guilds union meeting of the term held on Tuesday of last week was rather poorly attended, there being a noticeable lack of second and third year Guildsmen. The result of this was the passing of a motion declaring that if the publicity officer did not succeed in producing an attendance of two hundred or more for the next meeting he would be removed to the Round Pond and washed clean of his sins.

The meeting open, the secretary gabbled through the minutes of the previous meeting after removing the pencil from between his teeth, though judging from what one could hear this was unnecessary.

Concerning Morphy Day the president announced that an official invitation would be sent to R.C.S.U. challenging them to a tug of war on the towpath at Putney. Should this invitation not be accepted a coffin containing the remains of R.C.S.U. will be ceremoniously consigned to the river bottom.

The meeting was informed of the results of the previous Saturday's collection in the form of a tiddleywinks race down Oxford Street for this year's charity. The seventy or so Guildsmen who turned up raised some £81.

Phil Smythe then proposed a motion that a protectives machine should be installed in Mech. Eng. Dennis Taylor spoke against this appealing to all men, women and Children of Guilds to solve the problem by other means. Despite the suggestion that the machine should be installed in the coffee room and disguised as a coffee machine the motion was defeated by 36 votes to 31, a large number of people abstaining.

There being no other business the meeting was closed with the usual rendering of Boomalaka and with the unusual sight of D. Taylor actually succeeding in lifting Bolt.

IC Winks gained its second victory last Wednesday, despite attempts by the opposition to outwit us with such daring tactics as playing on their floor with the dreaded Japanese Wink (care of Woolworths). The result was an overwhelming success by 90½ points to 21½ This result was due mainly to good potting, especially by B. Pywell, who excelled himself on their floor.

Our first success was on the previous Monday, when Lower Mooney in the Union resounded to the cries of the frustrated ULU Fresh woman's team as the three pairs from IC got to work on the mats. Having removed the op[p]osition, IC went on to win 44½ to 18½.

This years' Carnival is for the Society for Mentally Handicapped Children and Carnival has already collected some money ! ? Guilds is doing phenomenally well, having collected more than £270, including £150 from the Lord Mayor's Show and most of the rest at the Guilds - Mines terrifying tiddly-winks tournament. R.C.S. also did well out of the crazy conkering i the King's Road. R.C.S. netted more than £100 from a pedestrian speed trap there to total £210. Mines has also collected about £53 !

The scene was set for a record-breaking year by a tiddlywinks marathon with M… down and across Oxford Street. About 60 people turned out on a wet Saturday morning to do battle and £75 was collected, which amazed everyone who took part and even M… (whose presence was debatable).

Lord Mayor's Show

Since the beginning of term, a lot of effort was put into the Guilds float, and its mere presence in the show was enough to promote a mammoth £150, with an estimated £20 from the Metropolitan police.This was an even more amazing result than the Winks, since street collecting during the show was "strictly forbidden".

Saturday, 7 November

TIDDLEYWINKS down Oxford Street. Assemble between 10.00 and 10.30 at Marble Arch. Come and collect for Carnival.

Carnival Week began at midnight on Friday, 12th Feb. at the Lyceum, and ended on Saturday with the incredible fete opened by the equally impressive Miss Julie Ege.

Saturday morning saw tiddleywinks No 2 which turned out 60 enthusiastic winkers and a gorilla, all of whom proceeded along the new underground section of the course from Marble Arch to Bond Street, finishing with carol-singing in Piccadilly Circus and an attempted break-in to Emperor Rosko's live Radio 1 show in Lower Regent Street.

Saturday morning saw the start of the annual tiddlywinks race in aid of SUK rag. The race started the season of foolish events that are planned to follow. To those not used to ragging, a tiddlywinks race may seem to be rather tame. Well, maybe so under normal circumstances. But SUK are a little more bloody-minded than your average tiddlywinker. So they hold their race down Oxford Street at 10 a.m. on a Saturday morning.

The FELIX reporter, not having the luck to live in Hall did not get fortuitously awakened by loudhailers outside his window at 9.45 a.m. Yet he did succeed in arriving at Marble Arch by the appointed hour of 10. The story continues…

"The first apprehensions of being the only winker on show were soon dissolved by the sight of at least one hundred other idiots (freshers being well represented and all were in a rather gay mood. Passersby at this stage seemed to be quite unsuspecting of the implications of such a body of students, but when the signal came from leader to cross Oxford Street there were many a gasp as determined winkers strode forward on their unprotected knees.

COCKROACHES

Few cockroaches were encountered but winks often came to a sticky end as they rolled away down drains and miscellaneous gratings, or even stickier ends on patches of used bubble-gum. Casualty rates were high; one reporter from a scene of some of the most catastrophic winking declared that as many as three winks had gone west, and none had been recovered.

DETERMINED

Others pressed on determinedly, and I witnessed the fall of Selfridges' and the horrors of escalator winkfare. The CIA have denied any responsibility.

MICK McMANUS

The police were considered marvellous: they turned up in considerable numbers, and lent the occasion a distinct air of authority. However, serious resistance was met from a Traffic Warden resembling Mick McManus's big sister (no offence meant) and who fiercely brandished her mouthpiece, exhorting the masses to wink only on the pavements.

BODIES

By this time, I got separated from the main body, or rather bodies, and only some of the disabled lurked in doorways, collection tins still rotting in their bloodied hands. Later reports put the money collected at approximately £345, although confirmation is awaited. No reports of fatalities as a result of the event have been received.

Yes folks, you read aright, your eyes did not deceive you, Rag Week is here again. Starting on 18th November ten days of fun, entertainment and excitement. Minimum charges, maximum pleasure.

The aim of Rag this year is to raise money for the following four charities:

• ACTION FOR THE CRIPPLED CHILD
• IMPERIAL CANCER RESEARCH FUND
• COUNTDOWN CAMPAIGN
• KASTUR

Various stunts have already taken place on alternate Saturdays of this term, as all you avid followers (if not supporters) of Rag will know.

On 7th October 150 members of the tliree constituent colleges of IC assembled at Marble Arch ready with tiddlywinks and collecting tins. Objective—tiddlywink down Oxford Street and Regent Street as far as Eros, and at the same time to collect as much money as possible. On this occasion £350 was collected for Action for the Crippled Child and Imperial Cancer Research.

On 21st October another crowd of eager stuntsmen, or rather 'chars' equipped with pans, brooms and loo brushes effected a mass clean and brush up of Oxford Street, Knightsbridge and Kensington High Street. In doing so they realised £260.

Two weeks later a competition was organised in which the various departments took part, each dept. organising a stunt—the winner being the one raising the most money. Amongst the crazy schemes dreamed up and performed were rolling barrels down Oxford Street, a pedestrian speed trap (unwary passers-by were fined if they were not walking at exactly 11 miles per hour) and an escaped 'madman' from a lunatic asylum. From all these a total of approximately £500 was raised for charity. The winner was Mining and MinTech 1 with their free rides round Trafalgar Square in Clem, who collected £140.

Later in the afternoon, a few aspiring 'Guy Fawkes' went along to Westminster and attempted to "blow up" the Houses of Parliament. Their efforts did not (unsurprisingly) go down well with our beloved upholders of peace and law.

So far, IC has raised about £1300… can we make it up to £3000 by Christmas?

TIDDLYWINKS RACE ALONG OXFORD ST. SATURDAY 5th OCTOBER 1974. MEET AT MARBLE ARCH AT10a.m.OR SEE YOUR V.P. FOR FURTHER DETAILS

THE ANNUAL Tiddlywinks marathon from Marble Arch to Piccadilly Circus via Regent Street, took place last Saturday. The whole show went off quite smoothly. It was a special feature for the public who found it hilarious to see over one hundred IC students grovelling on the pavement, in some cases actually on the road, with tiddly-winks.

Mines out to avenge their defeat last year by C&G went off well before anyone else and consequently finished in first, second and fourth positions. The third position is still open. Mines collected a total of £183.71½ using 30 cans. Their highest individual total was made by Tanya Frost who collected £22.44 and this included a £20 note donated by an Arab [sic original="shiek" correct="sheik"].

C&G collected £248.67½ from 54 cans and their biggest individual total of £15.88½ was collected by Janice Ford. RCS collected the grand sum of £287.99½. Unfortunately during the count, their cans were mixed up (they had 99 of them) and so have no biggest individual total. The reason they collected more than anyone else was that they gave cans and winks to all their participants.

The proceeds from the race are in aid of the Leukemia Research Fund, the British Polio Fellowship and Guide Dogs for the Blind. The amount collected, £700.38½ is £70 up on last year's figure. Congratulations to the Rag Committee for a great race.

You have all probably seen this young lady around and people in RCS should know her quite well. Her name is Louise John and she is in Physics I. She hails from the Welsh town of Flanelli and was unlucky to come only second in the Queen of Jez competition (who were the piss-artists that did the judging?). Louise has taken an active interest in rag and other events (she took part in the tiddly-winks race) and is a keen squash player. With such vivacity and good looks she should go far and do well.

Somewhere between Oxford Street and Piccadilly Circus on the day of the Great Tiddly-Winks Race, Dave Barnes (C&G V.P.) lost his megaphone. Mines (the responsible party) were subsequently offered 2 of their Shields and 1 of their helmets in exchange by C&G. The exchange date was then set for November 5th, under the auspices of the Queen Tower. C&G arrived on time and assumed a position of superiority at the top of the steps, with their demolition squad making preparations consistent with November 5th. When Mines turned up, C&G proceeded to blow up the Queens Tower (with a loud theatrical bang in a dustbin). After shouts and hisses, the exchange actually took place, followed by the respective CCU songs/chants. Surprisingly enough, the whole event finished peacefully, with C&G shouting 'Boring'.

Last Saturday morning, Mr Peter Teague, (of no fixed address), President of IC Union was caught single-handedly WINKING in Oxford Street, W1. When approached, Mr Teague (who carried on winking) was heard to say, 'I've always done it, and I think that more people at IC should participate'. When asked why he was doing it, he said, 'For those blind people, less fortunate than myself, who through no fault of their own cannot wink any longer'.

Mr Teague was taken to Bow Street police station where he was charged with winking on the Queen's highway under section 41. In a written statement, he asked for 221 other offences to be taken into consideration. These included one of organising a vendetta against one grease merchant and wholesale distributor of cockcroaches who wished to remain anonymous, but whose family motto is "Overcharge and undercook".

Later, Mr Keith Ahlers, the President of City and Guilds Union, and himself a born winker, joined Mr Teague and together they proceeded to wink down Regent Street, causing much havoc and a mess on the pavement.

For full details and sensational photos see centre pages

Last Saturday morning. In bright sunshine, amid cheers and shouting, IC's invasion of Oxford Street, better known as the Tlddy-Wlnks race, began. The Miners, including the IF contingent, arrived late (It was their bar-night the previous evening) to taunts of' you're late' from the already present RCS and Guilds.

The race was started by the president of IC Union, Peter Teague, who was promptly followed by the hordes of IC. Meanwhile, intrepid mechanics were attempting (rather successfully) to bring Bo and Jez alive for the event. During these Initial stages, many taxi and bus drivers worked hard to contain their desire to run down those "—bloody students who are getting madder every year".

There were not many out of the ordinary happenings en route although one young lady received the boot (literally) from an indignant citizen. John Cavanagh nearly had the wrath of the law brought down on him when he winked across a police car at Piccadilly Circus.

It was a very fast race, the winner arriving at Piccadilly Circus at 10.45am . Most people were in the 'Cockney Pride' by 11.30am.

The collection was well down on last year's. RCS collected a total of about £140, Guilds £204 and Mines £220. The Mines figure Includes £60 collected by IF. All monies collected will be distributed between the various charities that RAG is in aid of this year.

On Friday night, if anyone can remember it, the pub crawl 'occurred'; some marshals being in a worse state than the competitors. The fun now is to find out where exactly those pubs arel If you still have your scoresheet, please hand it in to the Union Office.

This event inevitably took its toll on the tiddlywinks next morning, but there was a good attendance; many thanks to all those who turned up to tiddle their winks.

The Royal College of Science Union Rag Committee wish to thank everyone who helped collect £733.57 on the tiddlywinking rag stunt on Saturday. The topthree Rag collectors were: Zosia Zbrezniak with £53.40[;] James Powell (Maths 1) £30.68[;] Jane Lavers and Helen Emms, (both of Life Sciences 1) with £30.40.

Now Richard, who rather fancied himself as a future Whitehall mandarin, thought that an appropriate beginning to such a noble vocation would be to join the Organising Committee of the Oxford Street Tiddlywinks contest, which is traditionally held on the first Saturday after term begins. For better or worse, he was allocated the task of seeing that no one cheated by surreptitiously placing their tiddlys in their pockets, and walking, rather than "winking" the course.

On the day, he was posted about half way along Oxford Street, equipped with his two anti-cheating devices,,,,two lumps of flesh, blood, tissue and nerves, four fingers and a thumb. Of course, he had thought that all his job would consist of would be first to indentify the lawbreaking winkers, challenge them, then demand that they turn out their pockets. This ad hoc procedure worked well for a while, until it finally dawned on him that there were members of BOTH sexes participating in the event.

At any rate, after sometime, his Kojak intuition suddenly told him that a buxom wench who happened to be passing him at the time was acting in a grossly suspicious manner. With the unabashed enthusiasm of a spider about to catch a fly trapped in its web, Richard laid both hands on his victim. It was at this point that he realised that his methods of search would have to be radically altered if he was to perform his task properly. With a suspicious glint in his eye, he looked at Anne, then again at what she was wearing a navy blue IC tee shirt over an elegant light blue frock.

'Where could she hide a tiddly or two?' he wondered to himself. First he took the obvious approach: he body-searched her. With cavalier gusto, he felt all over her shapely body, from shoulder to waist and so on.

Anne was quite bewildered by all this, although whatever it was, she said to herself, it was far more pleasant than tiddlywinking. All the same, when he'd completed this task, which was obviously so distasteful to him, Richard was chagrined to find no incriminating evidence whatsoever. He now went through a prolonged mental debate. Should he make a more thorough search, or perhaps suffer the humiliation of being outwitted by this foxy lady. All the while, a mischeviousvoice inside him kept insisting that this regal specimen of womanhood, who stood before him had tiddlys concealed somewhere upon her person.

Without further ado, in the middle of Oxford Street, on a lovely autumn day, Richard Bignall put his hands up a girl's dress and promptly got himself arrested for attempted rape. In reply to Richard's protest that he was 'just looking for tiddlywinks', the arresting officer was heard to comment that in thirty years of dealing with sexual offenders, he'd never heard it put like that before. But that's another story.

At the end of the afternoon, the gallant competitors assembled at Piccadilly Circus to pay their yearly homage to none other than that rascal Eros, the son of Aphrodite, the Queen of Lust. It was doubtless one of his arrows which pricked poor Richard's heart, smiting it with blinding passion. Nevertheless, perhaps it is significant that it Is at the statue of Eros, who is both the divine symbol of childhood and the personification of the most playful amorous desire, that a thousand or so IC students congregate each year.

Anne joined in the Ring-o-Round-a-Rosie in a state of complete ecstacy: she'd never realised that a tiddlywinks competition, in which, incidentally, she was not even participating, could be such a lascivious and erotic activity. It was only after she'd downed a few lager and limes in the "Cockney Pride" that she began to feel the earth beneath her dainty feet.

The last we heard of Richard was that when the judge asked him if he had anything to say before he was sentenced, he replied, "Beam me up, Scottie!"

Also there is no more time to see whether Captain James T. will come to Richard's rescue, for here my story ends. As Master of Ceremonies of this tale, it just remains to me to bid you a fond farewell. But if you'll bear with me a while longer, I've penned a few concluding remarks for your edification.

Saturday saw the first Rag collection of the year with Guilds collecting £747.50 bringing our Rag total to over £800, not bad for the first week (better than RCS). The tiddlywinking took place as usual with some people winking all the way up the steps of Eros. Despite a slight difference of opinion with the boys in blue, all of Guilds made it to the Cockney Pride, even though a large number of winks were lost down drains, up trouser legs or just into thin air.

HARDENED veterans and freshmen for whom the term tiddlywinks was merely a childish game, turned up for the first Rag stunt of the session. This traditionally is a mass wink down Oxford Street with Mines taking the middle of the road; Guilds to their left and RCS to their right.

So with their forces marshalled and ready the signal was given and the tiddles were winked. Styles varied, beer gut hindering more mature students. However, even the freshers soon gained the technique of simultaneously thrusting and rattling the Rag can.

Many techniques were used to attempt to avoid contributing but there was little escape even for the most ardent avoider. One rather lavishly embellished, but shop soiled femme fatal&eaigu; was heard saying that she was also looking for a few pennies herself. Undaunted, another willing helper approached, to whom she commented that she too was a pro. The spirit of the affair was echoed by a lady who fulfilled Wilde's comment that: "the tragedy of Old Age is that not one is Old, but that one is young". At the age of 60, she winked for a while in classic style, till whisked, with com- passionless efficiency, by her daughter to more 'fitting' pursuits.

The last thing anyone considered was legality until confronted by officers of Her Majesty's Metropolitan Constabulary.

Luckily, they either didn't find out, or mind, the fact that the event had not been licensed. Normally, rules are bent by using house to house collection licenses as very few street collections are allowed each year. However, apart from a few left over from last year in Mines possession, most collectors could not even produce this license if challenged due to an oversight by Rag Chairman, Ian Hodgson.

Despite this, the motley soon wound their way to Eros at which, to the surprise of the uninitiated onlooker, a 'Ring-a-Ring-a Roses' was performed at 12:10pm. Mines formed the innermost circle with Guilds on the outside, both moving anti-clockwise RCS in the middle performed a clockwise motion. Also surprised were those winkers told to be there at 1:00pm. The final act of the event was a well-earned adjournment to the Cockney Pride.

The laurels go to RCS who collected £930; top collector being Andy North of Physics 1 with £42. Guilds amassed £458, top collectors being, Martin Bellamy with Anthony Davis of CCD with £30.51. Mines collected £290.

Papers

Tiddlywinks was absolutely excellent. Well done all who went, I hope you keep it up.

The real blockbuster of the week took place on Saturday. About 170 intrepid [acronym short="RCS" long= "Royal College of Science"] persons turned out to tiddle and wink down Oxford Street. Despite being outnumbered by Guilds, RCS pissed all over them by collecting around £940 with a few cans still outstanding. Top collector of the day was Andy North of Physics 1 with £42. However, congratulations to everyone who came along, you're all stars as far as I'm concerned.

The next Rag stunt will be this Saturday and is a circus outside Harrods. Clowns and other performers should meet in the RSCU Office at 10:00am.

Tiddlywinks was a heap of fun, especially down the centre of Oxford St. In the end we collected £290 which means we collected more money per head than the other C C U s . Finally on Saturday night we held our annual pub-crawl, which although poorly attended, showed that the drinking spirit in Mines remains one of excess.

Imperial College's tradition of opening the year's Rag by playing tiddlywinks will go ahead on Saturday despite official opposition.

Last year, tiddlywinks raised over £1,200 in Oxford Street for the National Deaf Children's Society. This success, however, left only pennies for the less boisterous collections of the Multiple Sclerosis Society, who promptly queried the validity of IC's street collectors' licence. This year, determined not to be out-done, they have made a move against independant licences being granted on their flag day. Instead, they are extending their own licence for I C students to collect for them "provided they do not behave indecorously."!

Undaunted

Unfortunately, the Metropolitan Police, who had previously turned a blind eye to the winking of unlicensed tiddleys, feel that they must now step in because MS had officially complained that tiddlywinking was not covered by the street licence. According to regulations, collectors must stand perfectly still and at least twenty-five metres apart, and the police have informed the Union that they will be on the lookout for people infringing their rules in Oxford Street.

Not to be daunted, Union officials have decided to circumnavigate these technicalities by re-routing the students to the King's Road. Can holders and tiddlywinkers will mass together to a clicking of counters and a rattling of cans hoping to collect as much as possible before their legality is brought into question—if, indeed, it is.

Following tradition, RCS students will go down the left-hand side, C & G down the right, and Mines down the middle of the road. One participant last year spoke of tiddlywinking through a taxi, "but having a bit of trouble with the ridges in the rubber carpet." Another student hopes this year to master hopping his chip back up the steps of the tube station. Prospective tiddlywinkers are asked to appear in great numbers at their CCU offices at 9:30 on Saturday to collect counters and collecting boxes.

Quibbles

Union President Steve Goulder and Rag Chairman John Ferguson have stated that they will accept full responsibility for any legal quibbles. At the very worst, the fine could be £25, which will if necessary be paid from Union funds; but provided enough people turn up, they believe that the police will not intervene.

The Rag Tiddlywinks stunt has been postponed until next Saturday because of possible police intervention over licensing laws.

Traditionally, IC students have always tiddlywinked along Oxford Street on the first Saturday of term; this has always been considered the Freshers' Rag Stunt. But after last year's controversy over street collecting licenses, Scotland Yard informed the Union that if they went ahead on Saturday they would be prosecuted, despite the Multiple Scelerosis Society withdrawing their complaint after the Rag Committee had offered to collect for MS funds.

Several attempts to find a way around the law were made, but all of them failed. The most original of these was that tiddlywinking down Oxford Street had been done since 1968, and was therefore a folk tradition and exempt from the regulations. The Metropolitan Police wrote back enclosing a copy of the Miscellaneous Provisions Act of 1916 (section 5, regulation 3(1), schedule 2) which imposes a minimum precedent of thirty years on folk traditions.

At a meeting of the Union Executive last week, it was decided to proceed in defiance of the police, but along Kings Road to avoid the waiting constabulary in Oxford Street. King's Road is London's second busiest shopping street and, a collection in excess of £1,000 for charity was expected. But at a further meeting on Wednesday, it was revealed that Mencap (the society for the mentally handicapped) had licences which would allow the Union to collect for them on the following Saturday, and so the committee agreed that under the circumstances it would be wiser to postpone the event until Saturday week.

As an alternative Rag stunt for tomorrow, the R C S U will be selling Rag Mags at the University of Kent in Canterbury, leaving Beit Arch at 9:30am.

events. I can't blame my old mate John Eagleson, I suppose, but as Mines VP he ought to have known where to go tiddlywinking this weekend without relying on me to tell him.

The long-awaited Tiddlywinks Rag Stunt on Saturday was a great success, raising £980 for charity. None of the expected problems from police or Chelsea College arose.

Nearly a hundred and fifty students from the three Constituent College Unions started from The Vale and tiddlywinked up King's Road to Sloane Square. This represented a break from tradition, as until this year tiddlywinking has always taken place along Oxford Street, but after warnings from police and some trouble over collecting licences the event was twice put off and a new venue found.

In keeping with tradition, however, the contingent from the Royal School of Mines winked their tiddles single-mindedly down the middle of the road, while the more cautious members of C & G and RCS used the pavements. The route took them past Chelsea College, which was expected to be regarded by their students as an infringement on their territory; but there was no visible reaction from within. Furthermore, police presence was limited to a discreet inspector, two sergeants and three constables who raised no legal objections until Sloane Square was reached. At this point the students were asked not to propel their counters across the pedestrian crossings, as they had already caused a certain amount of traffic congestion.

The event drew to a close with ring-o-roses around Sloane Square. The students then descended en masse on the Royal Court tavern, where some customers complained of being harassed by over-eager collectors. Rag Chairman John Ferguson has written an apology to the landlord on behalf of the Union.

Because the money was delivered direct to MENCAP on the same day, individual totals for the three CCUs are not available.

The Tiddlywinks Rag Stunt will be held again at its traditional venue in Oxford Street this year. The stunt, usually held on the second Saturday of term, was transferred to the Kings Road last year after complaints from the Police.

The collection will be made on 15 October for [acronym short="MENCAP" long="The Royal Society for Mentally Handicapped Children and Adults"] using their cans and licences. These can be collected between 9:00am and 9:30am from CCU offices and from here will move off to Marble Arch. The finish will be held at Eros at 12:30 where ICU sabbaticals will lead 'Ring-a-Roses' around Eros. Gaynor Lewis will call a 'Hey Vivo' before everyone adjourns to the Cockney Pride for a well-earned drink.

(Gaynor tells me that she will buy a pint for anyone who comes up to her in the Cockney Pride after the Rag stunt—Ed.)

Tiddly-winks - Yes its back in Oxford Street and this time its all legal. Mencap are kindly letting us use their licence and providing us with collecting cans. Tiddly-winking will take place on the Second Saturday of term (15 October) - further details will be published in Felix.

We even had the honour of Passmore interpreting for the even more Irish Sean Davis who pronounced Eros—E-row-us and might as well have been talking about Keady High St when mentioning tiddlywinks down Oxford St (next Saturday).

And don't forget Tiddleywinks Next Week (Saturday 15th October) the biggest rag stunt of the year, and yes its back in Oxford Street.

Over 400 IC students collected a total of £2,555 on Saturday as they tiddh winked the length of Oxford Street in the second Rag stunt of the year. This represents the largest amount ever collected from this traditional event. The money is donated to the charity Mencap.

The combined forces of the CCUs took startled West End shoppers by storm with R C S starting from Marble Arch and Guilds from Tottenham Court Road. The miners took to the middle of the road so that absolutely no one got away.

The number one collector, a nattily dressed Guildsman, raised £49 and Regalia Shop salesman Carl Burgess who winked all the way, received a £16 donation from one generous character. FELIX Editor Pallab Ghosh was seen in the Cockney Pride more than an hour before the event ended, drinking large quantities of alcohol and massaging his sore feet. He still managed to collect £13, Gaynor Lewis raised £15, Sean Davis raised nothing and Christine Teller stayed in bed.

Irishman Sean Davis, not one of the sharpest people at IC at the best of times, got hopelessly drunk and lost the phone number of Mencap and was seen scurrying frantically all over Piccadilly Circus searching for a phone book.

After contacting Mencap Mr. Davis decided to hop onto a passing bus and tiddlywink on board just to say he had tiddlywinked the length of Oxford Street. He ended up in Islington.

The success of the event was due to the sterling efforts of Sean Davis, James Benbow (Rag Treasurer) and Dave Parry (RCS VP). After sorting out the Rag files they were able to persuade Mencap to allow ICU to use their street licences. Police congratulated President Gaynor Lewis on the organisation of the trouble- free event.

There is still a vacancy for Rag Chairman and the post seems unlikely to be filled before Rag Week. But the future looks bright for Rag. Larger stunts are planned including a departmental street collection during Rag Week. This has the potential of raising more than twice as much as Tiddlywinks if a similar number of people turn up.

Twenty Imperial students, mostly from City & Guilds Union invaded Capital Radio last Friday to give a demonstration of winking.

After a short practice at South Ken tube they descended upon the unsuspecting Capital Radio studio.

Ed Braman, the producer/ presenter of the news, was amazed when informed that 400 people would be winking down Oxford Street.

Mike Stuart, President of City & Guilds Union, in characteristic style hogged all the publicity and succeeded only in making a total wally of himself, as usual, to the nation's capital and was given a demonstration by Charles Relle, the London Open Tiddlywink Champion.

Wonderful response to Tiddlywinks, thanks to the 157 people who turned up. We raised about £970 and our best collector was T Burgess of Chem 1 with £38.87½.

Congratulations are in order all round for the record £2,555 raised on Saturday by tiddlywinking down Oxford Street. I understand that Mencap are absolutely delighted and are allowing us to use their collecting licence next year. Well done to Sean Davis, Dave Parry and James Benbow for persuading the Police and Mencap to let us collect and to everyone who turned up on Saturday despite the miserable weather.

If Rag is to continue successfully this year, the vacancy of Rag Chairman needs to be filled. If anyone is interested in the post they should see Sean Davis in the Union Office[.]

Tiddlywinking down Oxford Street

Raise money for Rag, and get pissed at the President's expense!

Meet at C C U Offices at 9am on Saturday morning.

Don't forget Tiddleywinks tomorrow morning. Last year we raised £2,400 for MENCAP. Please turn up to enjoy yourselves and help MENCAP.

TIDDLYWINKS down Oxford Street

Meet CCU offices 9.00am Saturday 13 October

I bet you thought this would be an article about Zen and the art of Motorcycle maintainance but its really about sex.

Sex is very interesting and quite useful if you know how to do it. Firstly you get your tiddle and wink it down Oxford Street. The method is quite straight forward. You angle your tiddle backwards and press on the edge nearer to yourself, press forcefully and this has the effect of propelling your wink a rather large distance.

We will be meeting in the CCU offices (that is RSMU, C & GU, & RCSU) at 8.30am to 9.00am on Saturday morning. I hope to see lots of you there. You can pick up your licenses, cans and tiddlywinks there.

Imperial College Charity Rag will be staging the very popular annual event of Tiddleywinks down Oxford Street on Saturday October 4. It's an event not to be missed and there are major prizes for the 3 top collectors. Meet at your CCU office at 9.00am to collect your badges and cans, and look out for posters throughout the week.

Our second major collection will be happening on Saturday October 18th, when we will be playing human monopoly. This is basically a treasure hunt thoughout London with your travelcard paid for by us. Clues will need to be solved, and a prize of an Olympus camera will be presented to whoever wins. In the evening of Monopoly, there is also a disco/concert being staged with Tri-60 and our very own 'Blue Blue Ice' performing (previously known as Duo) at the Hammersmith Town Hall. Tickets are 50p to IC Students and there's a bar at the hall.

Watch out for Rag week coming soon too, starting on November 12th. I hope you have fun participating in these events, and the money raised goes to a worthy cause.

As if all that wasn't enough, there'll be events in your Department and Hall of Residence… and the hyperactive maniacs amongst you will be up at the crack of dawn on Saturday to tiddley-wink down Oxford Street in aid of rag charities—one of Imperial College's more endearing traditions.

After you have been up until the early hours of the morning at Freshers' Ball try and get up to go tiddlywinking. The Rag article (on the page opposite) tells you about this.

Saturday

Tiddlywinking down Oxford Street… 9.00am

Meet CCU offices to pick up licences and tins. Street collection down Oxford Street to raise money for the National Society for Deaf Children. You must attend!!!

Black and white illustration of a wink having hit another wink and propelling it forward

Meet outside CCU Offices at 9am. Saturday 4th October

Saturday

Tiddlywinking down Oxford Street…9.00am

Meet CCU offices to pick up licences and tins. Street collection down Oxford Street to raise money for the National Society for Deaf Children. You must attend!!!

This is the place where the fun begins. Here to relieve the tedium and drudgery of normal college life is [acronym short="RAG" long="Raising and Giving"]. What's that then I hear you cry. RAG is Fun. RAG is Crazy. RAG is Big. RAG is Free. RAG is about Tiddlywinking down Oxford Street, Live Monopoly, Beer Festivals, Bungee Jumping, Freebies and Excellent Prizes. RAG is about having a laugh and doing it for charity. Just to prove it take a look at the line up for the first term.

Tiddlywinks 10/10/92

Yep, that's this weekend! Join hundreds of crazy students (that means YOU) armed with RAG cans and tiddlywinks and set off down Oxford Street. Tiddling under feet, round lamp posts, across roads, over Taxis and amazing tourists into handing over loadsa money. Follow this up with Ring-a-ring-a-roses round Eros and round the day off with a mammoth attempt to drink a pub dry.

[...]

Pavement Climb

If you thought Tiddlywinks was crazy you are not going to believe this. Its quite simple and straight forward even a Civil Engineer can understand it. Attached precariously to your climbing partner with nothing more than a piece of rope/string/elastic you will attempt to climb a shear horizontal pavement.

RAG TERM TIMETABLE

Day: Saturday

Date: Oct 10th

Event: Tiddlywinks down Oxford Street

The first RAG event of the year was a storming success with over 200 students taking part in the Tiddlywinks Down Oxford Street. Everyone had an ace time (despite bomb scares shutting down Oxford Circus) and we raised over £2,000. The day started outside Southside Halls of Residence with a deafening 'Wakey Wakey Southside' led by Rachel ' RAG Chair' Mountford. This was followed by Boomalakas and Kangelas from the [acronym short="CCU" long="Constituent College Union"]'s before everyone was ferried by minibus to opposite ends of Oxford Street. Armed only with RAG cans and tiddlywinks our intrepid tiddlywinkers tiddled their way down Oxford Street and Regent Street (the leaders making a small detour to avoid a bomb at Oxford Circus) to Eros in Piccadilly Circus. Shoppers and tourists alike were shocked into handing over loadsa dosh, happily making our treasurer's job a long and difficult one.

[...]

Also thanks to Dice & Games Ltd for donating the monster tiddles and A to Z Geographers Map Co Ltd for donating the 30 colour A to Z's for the top fresher collectors.

So you survived Tiddlywinks last Saturday, had a great time, met some people and drunk a pub dry or did you stay in bed all day and miss the whole thing? This Saturday you have another chance to be Mad, Silly and Part of it. The event is Live Monopoly. Real people, real streets and real prizes. Yes, this is not a bored game (sorry!) and we should raise loadsa money for MENCAP.

Rag 'Off Your Tree '93' got off to an excellent start this year with Tiddlywinks being the first event on Saturday 10th October. Over 200 students turned up to shock the tourists and shoppers into giving their money to Action Aid by tiddlywinking their way along Oxford and Regent Streets to Piccadilly Circus. Al l went well, despite the Oxford Circus bomb scare, and overall more than £2000 was raised. Afterwards some of the collectors retired to 'The Grove' pub to take part in the traditional 'Drink-a-Pub-Dry'. The very next week the streets of London were once again invaded by students,this time playing a real life version of Monopoly. Teams of 4 to 6 people had to visit the locations on the Monopoly board,answering clues and collecting treasure on the way. Altogether £4660 was collected in aid of Mencap and the top collectors won bottles of wine. The prizes were given out at the party organised by Mencap that evening.

10 October 200 raggies raise over £2,000 during tiddlywinking. £5,000 is raised the following week during the world famous Monopoly.