North American Tiddlywinks Association

NATwA founded • 27 February 1966


  • Publication name • The Missing Wink
  • Whole issue number •  2 (not marked; marked: Volume I, Number 2)
  • Publisher • North American Tiddlywinks Association
  • Publication date • August 1974
  • Printed page side count • 14
  • Preparation • Manual typewriter with headlines formed from various sized letters, cut and pasted onto sheets
  • Production • photocopied in black and white on 8½” by 11″ white paper.
  • NATwA Archives artifacts • original photocopy
  • Date updated • 17 August 2022 
To do:
  • (2022-08-17) Restructure in Elementor Pro with HTML semantic sections and IDs for table of contents
  • (2022-08-17) Sort People mentioned
  • (2022-08-17) Add tw-divider between top Toggle and main content
  • Bill Renke (humorously appears as “Winke” and “Count Von Winke”)
  • Ross Callon (humorously appears as “Vancouver Vulture”)
  • Sunshine (also appears as “*”) (real name: David Sheinson)
  • Severin Drix (also appears as his nickname, “Sev”, and also “Sevvy”)
  • Bob Henninge
  • Mary Kirman
  • Bill Gammerdinger (also appears as his winks nickname, “Red Scarf”)
  • Tim Schiller
  • R. U. Keating (fictitious name)
  • Otto State (fictitious name)
  • Noah Anot (fictitious name)
  • Cam (fictitious name)
  • Sue Donym (fictitious name)
  • Phil D. Space (fictitious name)
  • Dave Lockwood (humorously appears as “David H. Lokweed”)
  • Charles McLeod
  • Mike Crick
  • Phil Villar
  • Ferd Wulkan (real name: Peter Wulkan) (also appears as “Bull”)
  • Bryon Alexandroff (incorrectly appears as “Byron Alexandroff”)
  • Mike Gottesman
  • Mitch Wand
  • Flint (full name not known)
  • Joe Sachs
  • Alan Dean (incorrectly appears as “Allan Dean”), a British winker
  • Roger Clarke (appears as “RG”)
  • Goff Jenkins
  • Larry Kahn
  • Saul Agranoff (appears as his nickname, “TDI”, which stands for “The Dumb Indian”)
  • Scott Hirsh
  • Fred Shapiro
  • Charles Frankston
  • Rick Tucker
  • Jeff Weiselthier
  • Betsy Smith
  • Lynda Challis
  • Albert Wu
  • Bob Savitzky
  • MP Rouse (full name: Mary Pat Rouse)
  • Michael Schwartz (appears as his nickname, “Moishe”)
  • Diane (?)
  • Myro Mykolyshyn
  • Lewis Stein
  • Dave Barbano (appears as “Dave B.”)
  • Rich Steidle
  • Pete Copper
  • Jake Solomon
  • Evonne (?)
  • Charles Kuralt (incorrectly appears as “Couralt”): a CBS television reporter
  • Oakbyte (incorrectly appears as “Oakbite”): the telephone number at 40 Dane Street, Somerville, Massachusetts where Bob Henninge, Ferd Wulkan, and other winkers lived, and also used to identify the house and all of the people living there.
  • Milton Bradley: U. S. company producing games
  • Marchant Games: U. K. company producing games including tiddlywinks
  • BC: British Columbia
  • BIT: Boston Invitational Tournament
  • ETwA: English Tiddlywinks Association
  • HOTT: Halloween Open Teams Tournament
  • Hyth: Hark Yon Tree Hath (No Leaves But They Will Out Club), a noncollegiate tiddlywinks team
  • MIT: Massachusetts Institute of Technology
  • NATwA: North American Tiddlywinks Association
  • TBL: (?)
  • TMW: The Missing Wink
  • VW: Volkswagen
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SPECIAL BETTER LATE THAN NEVER ISSUE*

* winks have a strong sense of fair play

The MISSING WINK

THE VOICE OF THE UNDERGROUND TIDDLYWINKER

10 cents

Volume I · August 1974 · Number 2

BOSTON—In what proved to be the most entertaining pairs tournament yet the pair of Bill Winke and the Vancouver Vulture (aka Mr. A) lost four games in a spastic defense of their pairs title. The two behemoths found their stiffest competition in the pair of Sunshine and Sevvy poo who managed to beat them twice in their two encounters.

The multitudes who jammed the MIT student center were treated to a potpourri of winks action which included blitzes, a tie, game-winning three foot pots and everyone’s favorite, long, drawn-out rounds. The fact that the level of competition was high and the standings close was encouraging, providing more testimony to the shifting of power evident at this year’s continentals. The surprise of the weekend came on the second day of play with Bob and Mary going 3-1 for 18½ points to lead the day and propel them into third place,

”1 don’t know, maybe it was that pound of Cincinnati off-white I did last night, but people just weren’t lying down for us the way they usually do, said Winke, VV, busy eating a chair, could not be reached for comment because cf the crowd of thirteen year old girls around him. Sunshine explained things this way: “There was a forty per cent chance of us beating them if Bill played fifty percent of the time with his left hand while handcuffed to VV’s ankle because the statistics clearly show that ninety per cent of all pairs who play handcuffed together have a thirty per cent chance of making two foot pots in the fifth round, providing cf course the moon is full and they ate asparagus for breakfast.

The most exciting part of the weekend was an old theme with a new name spoken in reverent whispers as the ’’strategy session”. The Toronto team gets credit for this esoteric practice of winks enlightenment (always an Oakbite favorite) which may revolutionize winks strategy. For the uninitiated it goes something like this: ycur game is down, you need to huddle or things are just getting boring. You go out somewhere and get the Toronto strategy applied then return to the match. You may find that things may never be the same. Clearly, this strategy is not for everyone, but for the Toronto team the results have been really hair-raising. If all this is too ambiguous to you, ask Toronto (if you can find them).

Finally, keeping with our tradition of dumping on Winke, the dynamic duo dropped drastically in points per game over last year. For all the numbers see page ten. 

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Editor-in-Chief

R.U. Keating

Dirty Bizniz
Otto State

Contributing Editors
Noah Amnot 
Cam
Sue Donym

Fun and Games
Phil D. Space

NATwA’s underground journal of news, opinion and slander. Published randomly by People Owned Winks. Due to inflation 5 Radnor Street has been changed to 9 Radnor Street. Address all correspondence to The Missing Wink, 9 Radnor Street, Brighton, Mass. 02135 Apt. 2

Copyright 1974 by The Missing Wink. All rights reserved. Reproduction by any method whatsoever without permission of the staff is a waste of time.

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LeTTERS

A REBUTTAL TO SOLIDARITY

“Solidarity” has to be one of the worst examples of conceit I have ever seen expressed by a winker. It was an innocent conceit but it is evident throughout the essay. Why is it necessary for current and future winkers to follow in the footsteps of our illustrious predecessors? I am a winker of four years and find the game more intriguing every day. The level of competition at the Canadian pairs and the North American Pairs and singles was incredibly good. I now describe the game of winks as a sort of physical chess. We had our strong technical points in these games but at the level of play at those three tournaments, the tactical skill decided the games. I thrived on the competition and was really into these battles of wits. The reason the games were so fine is that they were competitive and to an extreme degree. Going out for dinner, bowling, and other external activities greatly enhance the fun at tournaments, but the best part is the tournament itself.

Solidarity says that the “new breed” of winker is having a tough time getting incorporated into the game. Maybe so, but have all you old winkers who are members of the winks “inner circle” tried to see the new breed outside of tournaments? Solidarity seems to imply that the new winkers should have to approach you oldsters rather than the other way around. This is the worst kind of conceit. Also, who are you to say that the game of winks and the people who play it have to conform to your set of guidelines? Our efforts should be spent in expanding the game rather than criticizing the people we have now.

DAVID H. LOKWEED

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cUP CAPER

Hot on the heels of the mysterious appearance of The Missing Wink was the equally mysterious re-appearance of the Missing Winks Trophy. The first report of its recent materialization came from Severin, who claimed to have found the hot item in the trunk of his car, shortly after returning to Ithaca from the pairs tournament. While the true story of its nether-worldly perambulations is not yet complete, the Red Scarf Underground has been hot on the trail; these are the facts in the case:

(1) Severin and his car were repeatedly seen together on the weekend of the pairs tournament, but at various times Severin left his car for extended periods of time. (2) The car spent most of this free time relaxing in the Oak-byte driveivay or in front of the Student Center. (3) During the course of the weekend, nearly everyone who played in that tournament was at some time present at both of those places!

You can see that the possibilities are staggering, and the road of investigation full of stones and unforeseen turns. Our agent, however, was staggeringly resourceful and, undaunted, left no turn unstoned in his quest for new leads. To wit—

What of the schism that split the victorious MIT team immediately after its return from England?

What of the rivalry for control of that team and its spoils, between MIT Red and MIT Blue, and the exile of certain dissident elements to the Far East?

Given how much each faction lusted for a cup, why did talk of replacing it not translate into action in the months that followed its disappearance? Did some among the rival cabals know that the trophy was only “out of sight”?

During the disturbance caused by the appearance of The Missing Wink, when nearly everyone went to lunch, why did a sunglassed Oriental come into the room, asking around for “the fat man”? What about the blue VW with BC plates that was double-parked outside the Student Center that afternoon?

And where was Tim, anyway?

Can it be, fellow winkers, that the evidence is so confusing because, close to success, a plot was foiled that weekend, a plot to transfer the long-stashed trophy into the boondocks? Can it be that only the chance arrival of this paper’s first issue and the dramatic interception by Severin’s car have prevented the sarcastic laughter of the exiles? Or may it have been that winks trophies, like the winks themselves, may often take strange bounces in the heat of a game to deny an undeserving victor?

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HISTORY

by Severin Drix

The history of NATwA shall be the topic of a series of articles in The Missing Wink. Comments are welcome, whether on the style, format, or contents of these articles, If anybody has further facts or corrections to make, please send these to The Missing Wink.

These articles and the corrections will form the basis for a series cf pamphlets similar to On the Mat and Winks Rampant, the pamphlets that describe the history of winks’ origins in England.

This article will be a general outline of our history, providing a context for future articles, which will go into much more detail than this one. It is also important to keep in mind that NATwA’s history does not exist in a vacuum, but is only a part of the history of winks. The development of the modern strategy game out of the Milton Bradley-style nursery game, and the step-by-step evolution of our current rules, tournaments, and teams is a process whose most important stages occurred in England. The pamphlets mentioned above are very interesting reading, and reading them would greatly enhance one’s appreciation of the history of NATwA. Back copies of the Winking World (available in Boston from Bill Renke and in Ithaca from Severin) would also help to give a picture of the history of the English Tiddlywinks Association (ETwA), whose offspring we are.

Winks began in North America in the summer of 1962. It is possible that individuals may have existed here who knew the Marchant rules (that is the name of the rules we use), but as far as is now known, the summer of 1962 was the first time that teams and matches existed based on these rules. Although Cambridge University is the mother team for England, and therefore for all other winkers as well, it is her archrival, Oxford, who is more directly the mother for North America. Oxford sent a team to tour the U.S. in the summer of 1962, and they played against the New York (football) Giants, a collection of people randomly selected at a hotel, and other teams, including several colleges. Needless to say, they trounced all challengers, but they left behind them some publicity (Time magazine did a story), equipment, and newly-converted winkers.

Roughly speaking, we may say that there have been three NATwA’s. The first “NATwA” was not really a formal association at all, but we may use the word to describe the winks community in North America from the summer of 1962 up till February 1966. It was not much of a community either, actually. The only real winks team was Harvard, other “teams” being collections of winkers scattered at various places, who might play an occasional game, but who mostly played winks only when Harvard suggested and organized the match. In all this time, no match involved more than two teams, and one of those teams was always Harvard. Right after the Oxford tour the level of interest was high among the people who had just been shown the game, and there were many matches. By 1965-66 this first “NATwA” was dying out. The first year there had been enough games for Life magazine, in its big article on Harvard winks, to speak of a full Ivy League (!). There were about a dozen teams across the country, plus freshman teams, and there was national TV publicity. But the next year saw only about three matches, and this pattern continued up until 1965-66. That year marked the second wave of British winkers to hit North America, and this replenished the stream that 

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that [sic, duplicate word] the first wave had created. Charles McLeod, a Scottish winker, came to the University of Waterloo for graduate studies, and founded a team there, as well as the nearby Waterloo Lutheran University. Meanwhile, Mike Crick (son of the famous biologist, and, with Phil Villar (who?) top pair in England) came to work at MIT, and spent a lot of time with the Harvard winkers, slowly changing their attitude, getting them to spend more time both playing winks and trying to organize it on a more stable and lasting basis.

The second NATwA, which was truly an organization, was formed on February 27, 1966. This date should be commemorated each year by celebration and lots of winking, for it marks the real birth of NATwA. Harvard had split into two teams, Harvard and Harvard Med School (where many winkers had graduated to), and there were a few Radcliffe winkers as well, forming sort of a team. The two Waterloo teams came to Boston that weekend to play the two Harvard teams, in what was considered to be the first Continentals ever (final standings: Waterloo, Harvard Med, Waterloo Lutheran, Harvard). They then formed NATwA, with Radcliffe also being listed as a member of NATwA. There are several differences of some importance between this organization and NATwA as we now know it. These differences are big enough, and the changes occurred around the same time, for it to be reasonable to refer to what we now have as a third NATwA. The main difference is in personnel and life-styles. Almost all winkers in Noth America today can trace their lineage, teacher to student, in a direct line to Severin Drix (wow). Severin started the Cornell team in the fall of 1965, completely independently of the existing winks scene.

He knew no other winkers, had no official sets (the first equipment Cornell started with was a Trix cereal set and a scarf!), and had only the 1962 Life and Time articles to go by, plus a bunch of campus rumor, for any knowledge of the winks scene and of winks rules (e.g. he did know about squcpping). Ferd was then a student at MIT, had been Severin’s friend since high school, got involved in winks primarily through Severin, and ended up starting the MIT team in the winter and early spring of 1966. All current teams, except Toronto, are offshoots of either Cornell or MIT. Toronto got started as a result of Waterloo, but there was little contact between those teams, and Toronto (this is the old Toronto: Byron [sic, correct=Bryon] Alexandroff et al[.]) stayed in winks primarily due to the activity of the Cornell and MIT teams, as all the previous ones, the ones of the second NATwA, died out. The Cornell and MIT winkers of those early days knew each other, and their friendship was the foundation for the sense of community which distinguishes NATwA from many other types of groups (even if this sense of community is not as strong as we’d like it to be). Yet though Cornell and MIT formed one social crowd, they hardly got to know any of the Harvard and Waterloo winkers at all. This was-partly due to the fact that these teams were already fading out of winks. Crick’s appearance only shored Harvard up for a while, and soon he too dropped slowly out of winking. Even at that first “Continentals”, Harvard had not been able to field a full team (which was eight in those days, as it still is in England), and when Cornell came to Harvard a week later. Harvard had only four players, plus one from Radcliffe. Harvard and Waterloo were like the late Roman empire, seemingly 

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more powerful than ever before, but the process of decay already evident, at least in retrospect. The only person from those teams that the Cornell and MIT winkers got to know at all was Mike Gottesman, the Harvard captain, who was chosen Secretary-General of NATwA when it was founded. None of that pre-Cornell crowd is still in any sort of contact at all with NATwA, and though this history will be quite accurate about all the events that involved the Cornell-MIT group and their descendants, all information about prior events is tinged with uncertainty, and is second hand at best, rumor-inspired at worst. The earlier winkers were more of the 1950’s type of student. They wore jackets, vests, and ties at matches, which were often held in plush cocktail lounges, with cheerleaders. Their style was a mixture of English properness and Ivy League. The Cornell-MIT crowd was really the first indigenous American winks movement, and the people in it were more the ’60’s type of student; not necessarily all freaks, but a group in which freaks could be, and were, an organic part. In general, a much, looser, more informal atmosphere came in with the new winkers. The earlier winkers also inherited their ideas about winks structures from England. The NATwA championship was a challenge cup, as most titles still are in ETwA; like with the boxing crown, you became champion by beating the old champ, and the champion arranged the time and place (usually a home game) for any challenge match. Matches were generally for two teams, and there was no overall structure to either guarantee that matches would occur (such as many “traditional” dates we now have, e.g. HOTT, BIT. Regionals, Continentals, etc.) or to give any sort of standings for the teams. In those days, also, there were very few games in a year, no pairs or singles events, not even an annual Congress or other means to to all come together or even select a new Secretary-General. NATwA at the time was an organization of teams, not persons. A team would join NATwA, pay $2 dues for the year, which would entitle it to play other NATwA teams and at some point challenge for the championship. There were no B-teams, and winks activity mainly centered around “club[“] play, rather than at matches. There was also no winks publication at the time. Most of the changes in structure since then were the result of Severin’s and Mitch Wand’s ideas, and represent a centralization of activity (as opposed to the more feudal system earlier times), and an attempt to permanize it.

While the Cornell team was growing and playing winks (a strange mixture of Marchant and Milton-Bradley rules) in the fall of 1965, they made repeated efforts to contact this supposed winks league that they’d read about in the Life article. The only team consistently mentioned in the rumors of a still-existent winks league was Harvard, so Flint, a Harvard student and a friend of Severin and Ferd, was set to the task of finding this not too active Harvard team. This was not an easy task, as the team was small, not too active, and not well known; it took him several months. Around December he found them, and joined their team (probably the first new recruit they’d had in a very long time). Through him, Cornell established contact with Harvard, found out where to get legiti-

The History article concludes on page 10, shown here.

mate sets and mats (and rules!), and arranged to play their first match at Harvard in early March. At that date, which turned out to be only one week after the founding of NATwA, Cornell was trounced, and then joined NATwA. When Ferd formed the MIT team about a month later (he had come to the Comell-Harvard match and met Mike Gottesman), they became the seventh team in NATwA. In early May 1966, Harvard was to come to Cornell for a rematch, but too many of their players crapped out for a variety of reasons. Instead, the new MIT team brought four players (Ferd, Bob, Jeff, and Mitch), and lost badly to Cornell.

CONTINUED NEXT ISSUE

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POINT OF View

State of Winks—Expansion, Contraction, Stagnation

In the recent past many important winks items have been placed on the endangered species list—we are very aware of the equipment crisis even though little is being done about it. However, an even more important commodity is dying out—new winkers east of Ithaca except on the junior level. Joe, MIT’s lone rookie, played in the fourth highest number of games in NATwA. this year, but only two other eastern rookies played at all—and they played a grand total of 13 games. Only a few others joined winking to the extent of TBL games. Look at NATwA on a team by team basis. Cornell, Rivendell, and to a lesser extent, Toronto have new blood. But Hyth’s championship team have all been playing since 1970. Somerville has added two new players in 2½ years and Zoo, since winning in 1973 has only one new member. MIT, under Mr. Lokweed, is the only eastern team trying for new players, but even they have had only limited success. And what of the returning NATwA members? Number of tournament games may not be a fair index but consider the following: of the three top teams only 4 players played more this year than in the previous season, the overall drop in games played being 17% despite there being the same number of matches. True, few players leave NATwA unless they are boondocked (and even some of them return for a few matches) but what does it mean that people are playing less (matches) and that new winkers are not being found or even looked for.

Problem 2: Consider the question of how NATwA can grow. In the past the two main methods of attracting new members have been: 1) introducing friends to the game and 2) chasing after freshmen at the beginning of school years. Of course something like publicity would be a valuable third method, but publicity has been scarce since the MIT England trip. Why? For one thing winks is not a spectator sport. It appears that even chess has has more spectator appeal—maybe because of its long pauses between moves that enable even novice players to feel like a part of the game by their trying to see what they would do in the situation. Some sports are popular because of their continuous action and/or exhibition of physical skills. Winks too can be exciting, but only to someone that really understands the game or to someone that is very curious. Some people follow sports because of emotional ties to a team or a city. In winks this barely applies to other winkers. When Bill played Allan [sic, correct=Alan] Dean for the World Singles Title most of the winkers present did not watch much of the match, preferring talking or playing games themselves. Thus, even people who understood the interesting subtleties of the game and who knew the players were not very interested in being spectators. I would say that our main claim to public attention would be as a curiosity item (not as a sport) and that this has little potential for other than short term publicity.

But then again, what would happen if say we suddenly did become very popular, maybe to achieve the unspoken goal of becoming an Olympic event. What changes would this produce in the game and its environment. To date we have had a large subtle control over who is a NATwA. winker. There

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is a Hyth personality, an MIT personality, perhaps a personality for each winks center. These are not stationary exact stereotypes but there are overall themes that are present if only because of the conditions under which new people first see winks. If the new player wasn’t like they were they might not know the established winker, they might not be around winking, etc., etc. This would no longer be true if winks went large scale—we would no longer be a group of people that basically knew each other and wanted to know each other. Maybe a publicity mad company would try to manufacture a team to win a title. Maybe we would soon have incredibly competitive and machined players that would go way beyond the likes we have now. Solidarity (TMW#l) voiced complaints against a breed of winker that was competitive and, to some fellow fellow winkers, highly bothersome. However, it can not be denied that this breed also enjoys the game and is really another breed of winker with a different approach (no value judgements this time), not a different species. What I would be afraid of in case of unlimited winks growth would be the introduction to the game of players that would wink to win only, not to enjoy. The MIT trip to England generated publicity and increased our relations with English winkdom. It also created a lot of tension in NATwA in the following season because there was suddenly competitiveness to win, to prove how good one was at the expense of others, to get to go to England. Fortunately, this problem died down, after it was discussed and after MIT stopped its funding. I feel that those problems would be mild compared to what could happen if winks did really grow.

(The purpose of this article is not to tear down NATwA. I am trying to pinpoint some problem areas that have been ignored and which are, when ignored, also unsolvable.)

 
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Down under

WINKE's BASEMENT

What sort of mysterious powers are used by the infamous Count Von Winke to attain his spine-chilling supernatural winking prowess? What bloodcurdling contacts with nether-worldly entities and extra-dimensional wraiths, what shocking contracts have been made by this mad scientist to reduce even the most battle hardened mortal winkers to lumps of mindless putty? In an attempt to unveil the dark secrets of this dangerous being, your fearless reporters have braved the unnamed dangers of his very stronghold. Deep in the Winke castle lies a dungeon, far removed from the light of day, a dank and clammy place of dread, whose psychic atmosphere may perhaps reveal the source of Winke’s power. Listen, now, as those brave men who dared to set foot in this dungeon (which Winke, in a desperate attempt to conceal his hideous secrets, blandly refers to as the cellar apartment in his house), and who survived and escaped, report on the eery goings-on they found there:

Mr. A reports that “the atmosphere there is like a psychic vacuum. It sucks you of all energy, like a vampire. I’ve spent days here, accomplishing nothing, wallowed in inertia, struggling to do anything other than revel in sloth.”

Mr. B comments that “this is a timeless sort of place. One could spend a very long time here, days or weeks or more could pass, and one would hardly notice time go by. It’s even hard to tell what time of day it is.”

Mr. C at one point expressed surprise when told it was 10:30 PM, saying that it felt very much like 3 AM of a very debauched and aimless night.

Mr. D commented that, when there, one was totally unaware of the existence of an outside world, or the goings-on out there, and that these seemed remote, unreal, or of no importance.

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EditoRiaL

Well, you thought it was too good to be true, eh? You thought because there hasn’t been a publication of any kind in NATwA for so long that we just couldn’t come out with a second edition within less than two years. We’ve got news for you, we’re real and we intend to come out as long as there is a need for fine investigative reporting. But the real news is not easy to talk about. Here are some of the facts: we put out a newspaper, the first in over a year, and asked for some help expecting that there would be some interest in the wake of this journalistic drought (some say it’s still going on, but anyway). Three people worked with one typewriter and zero money in order to get out a newspaper that was legitimately needed. The Missing Wink made a little over a dollar in net profits after its first issue and then proceeded to spend this money on stamps in order to get people to make some kind of reply to the things we printed. And guess what happened? We got one reply from Dave Lokweed. We’re grateful that at least one person cared enough to use a free stamp to express himself on the issues. It makes one wonder what the fuck is going on? NATwA is a small enough organization to have everyone doing at least something to help it along. What have you done lately in NATwA? Do you wonder who controls the show. Are you going to let this turn into another Watergate? And whatever happened to all those free stamps anyway? This didn’t start out to be an angry editorial but somehow sitting behind this typewriter I get the feeling that I’m pissing in the wind. Do we have to resort to making up letters like the National Lampoon? Well we’re going to give you one more chance. Admittedly this issue is a little overdue and we may have lost some credibility but we’re here for your benefit and we’ve got lot’s of good ideas in the works.

Take for instance the notion of a NATwA history publication. Not too many, including myself, really know about things back in the Harvard days. And although we have proven our superiority over the British, they have published their history in two installments while we have done nothing (not including Noah Amnots history series in this newspaper). And what of the idea of a winks yearbook. While everyone knows each other to some degree (she can’t pot in rounds, or he can bristol 270 degrees) how much do you really know about that person who is standing next to you (and I don’t mean what size shoe he wears)? These are a couple of the many brilliant ideas pouring out of the diseased minds at The Missing Wink. If all this sounds terribly boring to you—then tough shit because we’re all you’ve got until hell freezes over, which is when Newswink is scheduled to come out. If you have better things that should be put on these pages then get them to us.

This month The Missing Wink welcomes three heavies from, the Old School; Noah Amnot, Sue Donym, and Phil D. Space. It seems like eventually everyone is going to be underground.

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LETTERS

Though no one can seriously doubt my innocence in the TMW incident, I find that I am morally obligated to confess my part in the movement. True, few would accuse me of doing any work and hence no one could suspect me. But I had been waiting all year for a chance to prove I could do something other than mutter about retiring and TMW gave me my chance.

BILL WINKE

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            RG-G  S-S  B-M  D-L  T-S  B-R  F-J  C-R  M-E  F-X    W-L  PTS
RG-Goff            1    3    3    6    0    6    6    1.5  1   = 3-5  26.5
*-Sev         6         4    5    4.5  4.5  5.5  6    6    5   = 8-0  41.5
Bob-Mary      4    3         1.5  1    1.5  5.5  6    6    5   = 4-4  20.5
Dave-Larry    4    2    5.5       1    1    6    5    7    6   = 5-3  31.5
TDI-Scott     1    2.5  6    6         1    4    5    6    4   = 5-3  31.5
Bill-Ross     7    2.5  5.5  6    6         7    6    6    5   = 7-1  46.0
Fred-Joe      1    1.5  1.5  2    3    0         6    1    2   = 1-7  15.0
Charles-Rick  1    1    1    2    2    1    1         6    1.5 = 1-7  15.0
Myro-Evets    5.5  1    1    0    1    1    6    1         1   = 2-6  16.5
Ferd-XXX      6    2    2    /    3    2    5    5.5  6
          B-R S-S T-S B-M D-L W-L   PTS
Bill-Ross      3   4.5 2   3  1-3   12.5
*-Sev      4       3.5 1   2  1-2-1 10.5
TDI-Scott  2.5 3.5     2.5 6  1-2-1 14.5
Bob-Mary   5   6   4.5     3  3-1  18.5
Dave-Larry 4   5   1   4      3-1  14.0

FINAL STANDINGS

Bill-Ross   8-1    58.5
*-Sev       9-2-1  52.0
Bob-Mary    7-5    47.0
TDI-Scott   6-5-1  46.0
Dave-Larry  8-4    45.5

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QUIZ for PROFESSIONALS

How well do you know your fellow winkers? Do you even know what they do besides play winks? Maybe we need a yearbook to introduce people who have “known” each other for years.

___ Betsy    ___ Lynda    ___ Goff
___ Albert   ___ Bill R.  ___ Bob S.
___ MP       ___ Moishe   ___ Diane
___ Myro     ___ Lewis    ___ Dave L.
___ Fred     ___ Dave B.  ___ Tim 
___ Severin  ___ Scott    ___ Rich
___ Roger    ___ Pete C.  ___ Ferd
___ Jake     ___ Bob H.   ___ Evonne

A. company president
B. systems analyst
C. high school teacher
D. hospital organizer
E. solar air conditioner
F. Chinese student
C. retired teacher
H. physicist-to-be
I. civil (?) engineer
J. baseball player
K. marine biologist
L. unemployed trucker
M. law student
N. student
O. groupie
P. banker
Q. flautist
R. baker
S. cabbie
T. wizard
U. jr. clerk
V. sr. clerk
W. bartender
X. food nutritionist
Y. writer
Z. prodigy

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OFF the cup

Thanks and congratulations to Dave Lokweed and Co. in Boston and MP and Co. in Ithaca for keeping winks alive during the summer… SOUND OFF: how about a tournament between the Dead heads and the classical heads with the loser having to listen to an hour and a half of the winner’s music… Rumor has it that an obscure winks publication is due for release… FIRST TIME EVER: the pairs tourney game between Bob and Mary and Ferd and Pete C. was the first game ever played between the once famous Bob and Bull… In a random tournament last May, Bill Winke did not show up…

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FEEBLES WIN

Feebles Win First Game of World Series over Midnights 5-4

Feebles, 5-4

MIDNIGHTS                    ab   r   h  bi
Freddy Foulinsky,3b....360    4   2   2   1
Harry Katzenjammer,2b..417    4   1   2   1
Freddy Katzenjammer,ss.312    4   0   1   2
Lazy Looey,cf..........333    4   0   0   0
Bribery Joe,1b.........292    3   0   1   0
Bribery Smith,rf.......111    3   0   0   0
#67,lf.................177    2   0   0   0
Stupid Stan,ph-lf......250    1   0   0   0
Ape Man I,c............105    3   0   0   0
Twilight Teddy, p......5-1    2   1   1   0
Moonlight Mike,ph......417    1   0   0   0
Gopherball Gary,p......0-3    0   0   0   0
                             31   4   7   4
FEEBLES                      ab   r   h  bi
Jack Short,3b,.........125.   4   0   0   0
Shotgun Gibbs,ss.......417    4   3   2   0
Jesse James,lg.........312    4   1   3   2
Lloyd Robinson,1b….....381    4   1   3   0
Tom Wright,rf..........579    3   0   1   2
Fred Thurston,2b.......158    4   0   1   0
Underhand Ulrich,c.....188    3   0   0   0
Millie Ways,cf.........222    2   0   0   0
Curveball Cryhofski,p..4-0    3   0   0   0
                             31   5  10.  4

one out when winning run scored

Midnights.............1 0 0 0 3 0 0 = 4  7 5
Arboretum Feebles.....1 0 0 0 3 0 1 = 5 10 5 E-many DP-Feebles 2, Midnights 1. L0B-Midnights 6, Feebles 9. 2B-Foulinsky,H. Katzenjammer, F. Katzenjammer, Twilight Teddy, James (2),Wright. 3B-Foulinsky, Gibbs. HR-none. S-Ways. Not rbi-Thurston.

 

                 IP  H  R ER BB SO
Teddy 5 9 4 4 0 0
Gary (L,0-3) 11-31 1 0 1 0
Cryhofski (W,4-0) 7 7 4 1 0 0

T-0:57, A-7

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ACROSS

1. Unfavorite shot of most winkers.
5. Item of apparel popular in winks underground.
8. Initials of N.A. singles champ.
11. Potting out successfully – something to be ____ of.
14. To blitz ____ to try and play normal?
15. Main victims of 1970 Continentals.
17. ____ national competition. Not too much of it yet.
19. Tiddlywinks ____ no mere child’s game, we often explain.
21. ____ shots often have the most drama to them.
22. Most think ___ more fun to play pairs than singles.
24. “____ Winke had gone to Cornell…” – endless source of speculation.
29. Winks centerpiece.
30. There’s a severe ____ crisis these days.
31. 6 ___ 1 – most common score.
32. Short for first lady of winks.
33. Fell short when you try to pot and you’ll ____ your wink.
34. Musical note.
35. What you say when you want a hush to fall over the-crowd.
36. An important strategic concept.
38. Near the ____ you’d better add up points.
40. Home of the Panthers (abbr.)
41. The East-West dividing line of winks ____ has often changed.
42. Remember Charles Courault [sic correct=Kuralt] and his ____ crew?
44. To go to matches, you often get to take _____.
46. Winks team that took most of 44 across.
48. Old initials of our winks organization.
50. ____ per game.
52. Novices are sometimes _____ _____ case with the oldtimers.
53. A shot judge really has to be ____ top of the play.
54. Five of ’em.
57. Western city with no winks team.
58. Small but influential winks organization.
60. Winks is called Flohhupfen and les puces in different parts of ____.
61. Exporter of Tiddlywinks.
64. Played at 25 down (abbr.)
65. Southern Ethiopia Winkers (abbr.)
66. Surrounds ron in this team’s name.
67. Rounds take so long sometimes that the pot seems to collect ____ .

DOWN

2. Concave side ____ preferred.
3. The shot that made it across the ocean.
4. Don’t give up just ’cause you’re squopped ____.
5. There’s ____ many statistics kept these days.
6. If too many people (36 Down), it’ll ____ your team.
7. Mr. Keating’s initials.
8. (20 Down) ____ a lot in Toronto in 1971.
9. 2nd Secy.-Gen.’s 2nd favorite expletive.
10. Double squop (abbr.)
12. The world singles match is ____ for Thanksgiving.
13. One option after you get on a pile.
15. Favorite February event.
16. 4/73 Tournament.
18. Random assortment of 7 Down letters.
20. 1971 NATwA winner.
21. When 1st NATwA Secy.-Gen. put his mat in the washing machine, it ____.
23. Scene of (16 Down).
26. Delicate winks shot.
27. Ithaca is ____ of Toronto.
28. Favorite NATwA Lake.
30. Winks does this to many people at first.
31. Tough Shot (abbr.).
36. Psychological factors often cause a ____.
37. If your first 2 shots qo off the table, that’s ____.
39. Dead on Arrival (abbr.)
43. No woman is one either.
45. What French winkers do after a silly shot.
47. Soldier.
49. Down ____.
51. Often accompanies the Continentals.
55. Good (54 Across) fielding play.
56. A ____ and a mat and you’re all ____.
59. Looey the _____.
62. Gone under (abbr.)
63. What do you ____ when you need 7½ points to win?

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SuBScribE

AND HELP SEND R.U. KEATING TO TIDDLYWINKS CAMP

R.U. Keating is one of the many needy winkers around the world. His equipment consists of a crude squidger made of rat bone and a mat made of dog hairs and glue. In his tiny village of Westchester, Tiddlywinks is outlawed so he must resort to propositioning people for games in subway stations and the like. He has never gone to England.

There is hope though. For every dollar in subscriptions the Missing Wink will donate 10¢ towards the cost of sending a winker to the Severin R. Drix Tiddlywinks Camp. High above Cayuga’s waters these winkers will bask in the sunshine, eating peeled grapes and doing fingertip pushups (with the music of Bach in the background,of course). Don’t let your conscience plague you; subscribe today.

And just look at these savings:

Single issue cost (based on sixty
years at 10¢ per issue, 3 issues
per year) $18.00 Lifetime charter subscription 1.00 You save $17.00

YOU CAN’T AFFORD NOT TO!


 

Mail to: The Missing Wink, 9 Radnor Street, Brighton, Mass. 02135 Apt. 2.

NAME ________________________________

ADDRESS ____________________________

CITY _________________ STATE _________ ZIP __________

___ Please send mine in a plain brown envelope

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